The Commonwealth of New Lakemba is a gargantuan, genial nation, ruled by The Committee with a fair hand, and notable for its smutty television, vat-grown people, and punitive income tax rates. The compassionate, democratic population of 13.195 billion New Lakembans are free to do what they want with their own bodies, and vote for whomever they like in elections; if they go into business, however, they are regulated to within an inch of their lives.

The large, outspoken government prioritizes Education, although Environment, Healthcare, and Administration are also considered important, while Spirituality receives no funds. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of New Canberra. The income tax rate is 100%.

The frighteningly efficient New Lakemban economy, worth a remarkable 3,766 trillion New Lakembian Standard Kebabs a year, is highly specialized and mostly made up of the Information Technology industry, with significant contributions from Tourism and Book Publishing. State-owned companies are common. Average income is an amazing 285,442 New Lakembian Standard Kebabs, and distributed extremely evenly, with practically no difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Octogenarian swimsuit models insist that they've still got it, it turns out that you actually can put a price on intangible cultural heritage, posters on 'New Lakemban Values' advise against being proud of New Lakemba, and ice-filled coffins are ominously positioned in the corner of every hospital ward. Crime is totally unknown. New Lakemba's national animal is the Animal Kingdom, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests.

New Lakemba is ranked 219,329^th in the world and 8,669^th in The North Pacific for Greatest Rich-Poor Divides, with 1.34 Rich To Poor Income Ratio.