The Confederacy of Columbardy is a mid-sized, safe nation, renowned for its compulsory military service and irreverence towards religion. The hard-nosed, hard-working, democratic population of 78 million Columbards are effectively ruled by a group of massive corporations, who run for political office and provide their well-off citizens with world-class goods and services. Their poorer citizens, however, are mostly starving to death while being urged to go out and get real jobs. The populace has reasonably extensive civil rights, although these are mostly aimed at allowing them to buy whatever they like.

The relatively small government juggles the competing demands of Administration, Education, and Law & Order. Citizens pay a flat income tax of 10.0%.

The thriving Columbard economy, worth 5.95 trillion dollars a year, is broadly diversified and led by the Retail industry, with major contributions from Trout Farming, Information Technology, and Gambling. Average income is 76,237 dollars, but there is a significant disparity between incomes, with the richest 10% of citizens earning 223,046 per year while the poor average 20,566, a ratio of 10.8 to 1.

The year's most anticipated show is "Great Deals on Delicious Meals", male cubicle workers stand up every time a woman enters the room, serial killers who are released early distribute death but not their seed, and citizens are bombarded with advertising from their compulsory miniature radios. Crime, especially youth-related, is well under control. Columbardy's national animal is the turkey, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests.

Columbardy is ranked 292,553^rd in the world and 4,094^th in The North Pacific for Largest Welfare Programs, scoring 177.64 on the Safety Net Mesh Density Rating.