The United Socialist States of Esperonia is a mammoth, genial nation, ruled by President Scarboro with an even hand, and notable for its state-planned economy, smutty television, and irreverence towards religion. The compassionate, cheerful population of 8.459 billion Esperonians enjoy extensive civil rights and enjoy a level of social equality free from the usual accompanying government corruption.

The enormous government juggles the competing demands of Administration, Education, and Environment. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Batasunara. The average income tax rate is 99.4%.

The frighteningly efficient Esperonian economy, worth a remarkable 1,904 trillion Carbon Coins a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. The industrial sector, which is highly specialized, is mostly made up of the Information Technology industry, with significant contributions from Tourism and Book Publishing. Average income is an amazing 225,118 Carbon Coins, and distributed extremely evenly, with practically no difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

The government officially wants you to slow down and speak more clearly, undersea volcanoes receive strongly worded letters for violating environmental regulations, schoolchildren on field trips are asked what torture means to them, and there's a mortuary next to every Esperonian restaurant. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a capable police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Esperonia's national animal is the Okapi, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests, and its national religion is None.

Esperonia is ranked 328,946^th in the world and 4,708^th in The North Pacific for Largest Pizza Delivery Sector, scoring -21.67 on the Pepperoni Propulsion Productivity Index.