The Reform Colons of Sortopia is a massive, cultured nation, ruled by Nigel Knob-Ed-Fararsh with a fair hand, and remarkable for its teetotalling pirates, lack of airports, and state-planned economy. The compassionate, democratic population of 2.153 billion Thick Fat Bigots are free to do what they want with their own bodies, and vote for whomever they like in elections; if they go into business, however, they are regulated to within an inch of their lives.

The government — a sprawling, bureaucracy-choked, liberal, socially-minded, outspoken morass — juggles the competing demands of Administration, Education, and Welfare. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Wethersmears. The average income tax rate is 83.6%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The powerhouse Thick Fat Bigoted economy, worth 163 trillion Angry Rants a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. The industrial sector, which is highly specialized, is led by the Book Publishing industry, with significant contributions from Tourism and Furniture Restoration. Average income is 75,993 Angry Rants, and distributed extremely evenly, with practically no difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Elevator music has been replaced by thrash metal played at maximum volume, racial supremacists indulge their wildest fantasies in cinemas and theatres across the nation, The Pipe Bomb Makers' Pop-Up Book can be found in preschool libraries, and census workers struggle to account for the rapidly increasing number of citizens to tabulate. Crime is totally unknown, thanks to a well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Sortopia's national animal is the Red Faced Gammon, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests, and its national religion is Multi-Faith.

Sortopia is ranked 3,426^th in the world and 142^nd in The North Pacific for Largest Welfare Programs, scoring 7,511.95 on the Safety Net Mesh Density Rating.