The Kingdom of Merconitonitopia is a gargantuan, efficient nation, ruled by Mansebat II with an iron fist, and remarkable for its ban on automobiles, compulsory vegetarianism, and compulsory gun ownership. The hard-nosed, cynical, humorless, devout population of 28.64 billion Onitonites are ruled without fear or favor by a psychotic dictator, who outlaws just about everything and refers to the populace as "my little playthings."

The enormous, corrupt, moralistic, socially-minded, well-organized government is primarily concerned with Defense, with Spirituality, Environment, and Law & Order also on the agenda. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Bahmedag. The income tax rate is 100%.

The frighteningly efficient Onitonite economy, worth an astonishing 16,919 trillion virtues a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. However, for those in the know, there is an enormous, deeply entrenched, highly specialized black market in Arms Manufacturing, Basket Weaving, and Furniture Restoration. The private sector mostly consists of enterprising ten-year-olds selling lemonade on the sidewalk, but the government is looking at stamping this out. Average income is a breathtaking 590,764 virtues, and distributed extremely evenly, with practically no difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

The hills are alive with the smell of burning flesh, Onitonites have replaced bears in a popular idiom, tax revenue is often intercepted by international accountants before ever seeing the national treasury, and travelers are subject to extensive searches if beet stains are visible on their clothing. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a very well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Merconitonitopia's national animal is the dove, which soars majestically through the nation's famously clear skies, and its national religion is Christianity.

Merconitonitopia is ranked 26^th in the world and 1^st in The North Pacific for Most Extensive Public Healthcare, scoring 33,878.96 on the Theresa-Nightingale Rating.