The Federal Republic of Kalisto is a colossal, cultured nation, renowned for its daily referendums, ritual sacrifices, and smutty television. The compassionate, hard-working, democratic, cheerful population of 3.531 billion Kalistoans enjoy extensive civil freedoms, particularly in social issues, while business tends to be more regulated.

The medium-sized, liberal government juggles the competing demands of Education, Administration, and Industry. The average income tax rate is 77.7%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The frighteningly efficient Kalistoan economy, worth 554 trillion Kalis a year, is broadly diversified and dominated by the Information Technology industry, with significant contributions from Retail, Uranium Mining, and Book Publishing. Average income is an impressive 157,140 Kalis, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 2.3 times as much as the poorest.

4-year-olds are often found reminiscing about the 'good old days', the slowest students feel vaguely targeted by their Mendelian Inheritance coursework, the television adaptation of Jennifer Government is the most popular program in the nation, and the Messiah (formerly known as Brian) is a mayoral candidate. Crime is totally unknown, thanks to a capable police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Kalisto's national animal is the Tiber, which teeters on the brink of extinction due to widespread deforestation.

Kalisto is ranked 304,005^th in the world and 4,464^th in The North Pacific for Most Advanced Defense Forces, scoring -13.04 on the Total War Preparedness Rating.