The Lost Weekend of UPC is a mammoth, environmentally stunning nation, ruled by Phoebe with an even hand, and renowned for its rum-swilling pirates, multi-spousal wedding ceremonies, and devotion to social welfare. The compassionate, cheerful population of 9.049 billion Radiants are fiercely patriotic and enjoy great social equality; they tend to view other, more capitalist countries as somewhat immoral and corrupt.

The government — a sprawling, bureaucracy-choked, socially-minded morass — juggles the competing demands of Education, Environment, and Industry. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Urithiru. The average income tax rate is 97.5%.

The frighteningly efficient Radiant economy, worth a remarkable 1,162 trillion Diamond Broams a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. The industrial sector, which is extremely specialized, is mostly made up of the Information Technology industry, with significant contributions from Book Publishing. Average income is an impressive 128,429 Diamond Broams, and distributed extremely evenly, with practically no difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Companies struggle to cover for the hordes of employees on parental leave, the government has solemnly sworn not to look up other nations' internet browsing history if the favor is returned, the weather report is the prisoners' favourite programme, and construction of the Really Big Hadron Collider is underway. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a capable police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. UPC's national animal is the Windspren, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests, and its national religion is the Church of Honor.

UPC is ranked 327,112^th in the world and 1,400^th in Europeia for Largest Cheese Export Sector, scoring -9.96 on the Mozzarella Productivity Index.