The Dictatorship of Eyuqsnaih is a colossal, cultured nation, ruled by Aȯxïiasim Oxïuxāxuafai with an even hand, and notable for its keen interest in outer space, free-roaming dinosaurs, and compulsory vegetarianism. The compassionate, humorless population of 3.661 billion Eyuqsnaihians are fiercely patriotic and enjoy great social equality; they tend to view other, more capitalist countries as somewhat immoral and corrupt.

The enormous, corrupt, socially-minded government juggles the competing demands of Administration, Education, and Law & Order. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of New Shropshire. The average income tax rate is 95.8%.

The frighteningly efficient Eyuqsnaihian economy, worth 558 trillion Eyes a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. The industrial sector, which is fairly diversified, is led by the Information Technology industry, with major contributions from Book Publishing, Beef-Based Agriculture, and Trout Farming. Average income is an impressive 152,506 Eyes, and distributed extremely evenly, with practically no difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

School history books often refer to Aȯxïiasim Oxïuxāxuafai as "that imperialist pig dog", murderers facing life in prison listen to long sermons on positive thinking, political speeches that drill deep into bureaucratic fine detail could be said to be a little boring, and the military recognizes no difference between male and female soldiers. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a very well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Eyuqsnaih's national animal is the cow, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests.

Eyuqsnaih is ranked 15,925^th in the world and 409^th in the South Pacific for Most Cultured, scoring 95 on the Snufflebottom-Wiggendum Pentatonic Scale.