The Peoples Republic of Salessll is a titanic, safe nation, ruled by President Jacob Hali with a fair hand, and notable for its museums and concert halls, free-roaming dinosaurs, and devotion to social welfare. The compassionate, hard-working, democratic, devout population of 11.562 billion Salans hold their civil and political rights very dear, although the wealthy and those in business tend to be viewed with suspicion.

The medium-sized government prioritizes Administration, although Education, Environment, and Industry are also considered important, while Spirituality and International Aid are ignored. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Tocktockwo. The average income tax rate is 33.5%, but much higher for the wealthy.

The frighteningly efficient Salan economy, worth a remarkable 1,986 trillion Zelmas a year, is fairly diversified and led by the Tourism industry, with major contributions from Retail, Book Publishing, and Beef-Based Agriculture. Average income is an impressive 171,773 Zelmas, and distributed extremely evenly, with little difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Toy versions of heroin paraphernalia let kids pretend to be their favourite TV characters, most academic research has ground to a halt, commercial breaks often lead to nervous breakdowns, and political visitors are forced to stop ten paces from President Jacob Hali's throne. Crime is totally unknown, thanks to a capable police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Salessll's national animal is the Black Cat, which is also the nation's favorite main course.

Salessll is ranked 32,322^nd in the world and 449^th in the South Pacific for Lowest Crime Rates, with 86.1 law-abiding acts per hour.