The Democratic Republic of New Bulacan is a mammoth, genial nation, ruled by President Martin Moreno-Quisumbing with a fair hand, and renowned for its museums and concert halls, punitive income tax rates, and devotion to social welfare. The compassionate, democratic, cheerful population of 9.423 billion New Bulacanians are free to do what they want with their own bodies, and vote for whomever they like in elections; if they go into business, however, they are regulated to within an inch of their lives.

The large government juggles the competing demands of Industry, Education, and Administration. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of New Malolos City. The average income tax rate is 95.6%.

The frighteningly efficient New Bulacanian economy, worth a remarkable 1,791 trillion New Bulacanian Pesos a year, is fairly diversified and led by the Tourism industry, with major contributions from Information Technology, Book Publishing, and Beef-Based Agriculture. State-owned companies are common. Average income is an impressive 190,074 New Bulacanian Pesos, and distributed extremely evenly, with practically no difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Trickle-down healthcare props up the poorest in society, a rebrand a day keeps the debt collectors away, cultural heritage is measured in Scoville Heat Units, and funeral directors are frequently looking at their watches during funerals. Crime is totally unknown, thanks to a capable police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. New Bulacan's national animal is the New Bulacanian Eagle, which is also the nation's favorite main course, and its national religion is Christianity.

New Bulacan is ranked 5,113^th in the world and 86^th in the South Pacific for Highest Poor Incomes, with 163,071.43 Standard Monetary Units.