The Republic of Land of Mari is a titanic, safe nation, ruled by Vance Guy with a fair hand, and renowned for its soft-spoken computers, hatred of cheese, and devotion to social welfare. The compassionate, democratic, cheerful population of 11.518 billion Land of Marians are free to do what they want with their own bodies, and vote for whomever they like in elections; if they go into business, however, they are regulated to within an inch of their lives.

The enormous, liberal, outspoken government juggles the competing demands of Administration, Education, and Environment. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Annapaltimore. The income tax rate is 100%.

The frighteningly efficient Land of Marian economy, worth a remarkable 2,851 trillion Old Bays a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. The industrial sector, which is quite specialized, is mostly made up of the Information Technology industry, with significant contributions from Book Publishing and Tourism. Average income is an amazing 247,603 Old Bays, and distributed extremely evenly, with little difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Destitute athletes are forced to train in the street, a cat may look at a king and a dude can look at an ass, excessive wheelchair ramps on government buildings have been compared to theme park attractions, and builders across Land of Mari are blocked up with orders for new public loos. Crime is totally unknown. Land of Mari's national animal is the Crab, which is also the nation's favorite main course.

Land of Mari is ranked 535^th in the world and 13^th in the South Pacific for Most Eco-Friendly Governments, scoring 19,410.95 on the Dolphin Recycling Awareness Index.