The People's Republic of Parkintopia is a colossal, efficient nation, ruled by Sunni Fa'asavalu with a fair hand, and renowned for its anti-smoking policies, ban on automobiles, and stringent health and safety legislation. The compassionate, democratic population of 2.925 billion Parkintopians love a good election, and the government gives them plenty of them. Universities tend to be full of students debating the merits of various civil and political rights, while businesses are tightly regulated and the wealthy viewed with suspicion.

The government — a sprawling, bureaucracy-choked, socially-minded morass — juggles the competing demands of Administration, Education, and Environment. The average income tax rate is 95.2%.

The powerhouse Parkintopian economy, worth 312 trillion Sables a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. The industrial sector, which is highly specialized, is mostly made up of the Tourism industry, with significant contributions from Book Publishing and Basket Weaving. Average income is an impressive 106,726 Sables, and distributed extremely evenly, with practically no difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Socialism gives everyone a share of the economy's growing carbon footprint, no one questions why the chicken crossed the road anymore, sales of disinfectant wipes have skyrocketed, and veterans are directed into environmental cleanup operations. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Parkintopia's national animal is the Llama, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests, and its national religion is Agnosticism.

Parkintopia is ranked 5,078^th in the world and 156^th in the South Pacific for Nicest Citizens, with 45.83 average smiles per day.