The Allied States of Jankono is a titanic, efficient nation, ruled by Leader with a fair hand, and renowned for its state-planned economy, punitive income tax rates, and stringent health and safety legislation. The compassionate, democratic, cheerful population of 10.068 billion OOFS are free to do what they want with their own bodies, and vote for whomever they like in elections; if they go into business, however, they are regulated to within an inch of their lives.

The large, liberal government juggles the competing demands of Administration, Education, and Environment. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Totally Normal City. The average income tax rate is 97.1%.

The frighteningly efficient OOF economy, worth a remarkable 1,882 trillion robucks a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. The industrial sector, which is quite specialized, is led by the Information Technology industry, with major contributions from Tourism and Book Publishing. Average income is an impressive 186,996 robucks, and distributed extremely evenly, with practically no difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Noobs are considered a delicacy, practising saying 'how now brown cow' is an essential part of holiday planning, bemused citizens are encouraged to sing foreign-language hymns of religions they have never heard of, and constituents prefer a carrot and boomstick approach to dealing with politicians. Crime is totally unknown. Jankono's national animal is the noob, which is also the nation's favorite main course, and its national religion is ALL OF THEM.

Jankono is ranked 304,362^nd in the world and 3,976^th in The East Pacific for Most Advanced Defense Forces, scoring -18.44 on the Total War Preparedness Rating.