The Pacific Republic of Talitoa is a titanic, safe nation, ruled by Jarnet Billings with an even hand, and notable for its smutty television, conspicuous electricity pylons, and hatred of cheese. The compassionate, democratic, cheerful, devout population of 20.058 billion Talitoans enjoy extensive civil rights and enjoy a level of social equality free from the usual accompanying government corruption.

The enormous government juggles the competing demands of Education, Environment, and Administration. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Takkatok. The income tax rate is 100%.

The frighteningly efficient Talitoan economy, worth a remarkable 4,854 trillion Talios a year, is highly specialized and led by the Information Technology industry, with significant contributions from Book Publishing and Tourism. State-owned companies are common. Average income is an amazing 242,010 Talios, and distributed extremely evenly, with little difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Entomologists flock to Takkatok for its remarkable gadfly population, a certain animated paperclip is enjoying his sunset years at the government's expense, civil engineers are undermining sinkholes, and the government single-handedly sustains the bunk bed market. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a capable police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Talitoa's national animal is the Oarfish, which is also the nation's favorite main course, and its national religion is Zelionism.

Talitoa is ranked 332,642^nd in the world and 4,229^th in The East Pacific for Highest Disposable Incomes, with zero Standard Monetary Units.