The United States of Assies is a huge, efficient nation, renowned for its ubiquitous missile silos, compulsory military service, and spontaneously combusting cars. The hard-nosed, hard-working population of 575 million Australians are either ruled by a sleek, efficient government or a conglomerate of multinational corporations; it's difficult to tell which.

The relatively small, pro-business government is primarily concerned with Defense, with Administration, Law & Order, and Industry also on the agenda, while Spirituality and International Aid aren't funded at all. Citizens pay a flat income tax of 13.2%.

The all-consuming Assiesian economy, worth 48.4 trillion Gold Bars a year, is broadly diversified and led by the Arms Manufacturing industry, with major contributions from Uranium Mining, Information Technology, and Beef-Based Agriculture. Average income is 84,103 Gold Bars, but there is a significant disparity between incomes, with the richest 10% of citizens earning 293,621 per year while the poor average 17,521, a ratio of 16.8 to 1.

All government facilities are built in the subterranean citadel of Assies City, East Lebatuckese astronauts' favorite game during downtime on the Multinational Space Station is 'I Spy', crime is on the rise as online youths compete to vlog the most shocking scenes of violence, and the words guilty and evidence have left the Assiesian lexicon. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a capable police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Assies's national animal is the Bald Eagle, which teeters on the brink of extinction due to toxic air pollution.

Assies is ranked 289,313^th in the world and 4,296^th in The North Pacific for Highest Foreign Aid Spending, scoring -8.94 on the Clooney Contribution Index.