The Patron Saint of Academics of Professor Thomas is a titanic, safe nation, ruled by Venerable Provost with an even hand, and remarkable for its pith helmet sales, compulsory military service, and ubiquitous missile silos. The hard-working population of 14.013 billion Professors have some civil rights, but not too many, enjoy the freedom to spend their money however they like, to a point, and take part in free and open elections, although not too often.

The medium-sized government juggles the competing demands of Defense, Healthcare, and Administration. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Capital District. The average income tax rate is 76.9%.

The frighteningly efficient Professorian economy, worth a remarkable 2,109 trillion Academias a year, is fairly diversified and led by the Information Technology industry, with major contributions from Tourism, Arms Manufacturing, and Book Publishing. State-owned companies are common. Average income is an impressive 150,518 Academias, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 3.5 times as much as the poorest.

Older ladies are inundated with offers to help them cross the road, businesses are required to round down their profits, the alien invasion siren sounds eerily like a UFO, and the trail of chickpeas is a controversial part of middle school curriculum. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a capable police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Professor Thomas's national animal is the elephant seal, which frolics freely in the nation's sparkling oceans, and its national religion is Christianity.

Professor Thomas is ranked 77,939^th in the world and 525^th in Europe for Nicest Citizens, with 15.51 average smiles per day.