The Mystical Isles of Dutchyland is a gargantuan, environmentally stunning nation, ruled by Dutchy with an even hand, and remarkable for its museums and concert halls, anti-smoking policies, and devotion to social welfare. The compassionate, democratic, cheerful population of 20.232 billion Dutchylandians enjoy extensive civil rights and enjoy a level of social equality free from the usual accompanying government corruption.

The enormous, socially-minded government juggles the competing demands of Education, Environment, and Welfare. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Dutchopolis. The income tax rate is 100%.

The frighteningly efficient Dutchylandian economy, worth a remarkable 6,676 trillion Dutchers a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. The industrial sector, which is highly specialized, is led by the Book Publishing industry, with major contributions from Tourism and Information Technology. Average income is an amazing 330,005 Dutchers, and distributed extremely evenly, with little difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Elderly citizens regularly buy posh multimillion-Dutcher mansions, Dutchy has been known to make speeches in fishing waders, travelers are subject to extensive searches if beet stains are visible on their clothing, and pretending to be prejudiced is a good way to get out of jury duty. Crime is totally unknown, thanks to a well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Dutchyland's national animal is the Dutchay, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests.

Dutchyland is ranked 239,862^nd in the world and 9,604^th in The North Pacific for Largest Cheese Export Sector, scoring -29.77 on the Mozzarella Productivity Index.