The Republic of Syaftyn is a colossal, efficient nation, ruled by President Syaf with an even hand, and remarkable for its smutty television, ubiquitous missile silos, and keen interest in outer space. The hard-nosed, hard-working population of 3.894 billion Syaftynians have some civil rights, but not too many, enjoy the freedom to spend their money however they like, to a point, and take part in free and open elections, although not too often.

The relatively small government juggles the competing demands of Education, Industry, and Administration. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Fatin Miryokuteki. The average income tax rate is 19.0%.

The frighteningly efficient Syaftynian economy, worth 931 trillion dollars a year, is fairly diversified and led by the Information Technology industry, with major contributions from Tourism, Retail, and Beef-Based Agriculture. Average income is an amazing 239,341 dollars, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 3.3 times as much as the poorest.

The entire entry for Syaftyn in the Hitchhiker's Guide to the World reads 'mostly harmless', foreign leaders are advising that President Syaf's letters must have gotten lost in the mail, dozens of viewers go online to hear whether a comma has been added to Clause 5 in Subsection B of Law 58375, and the military is recruiting war criminals to join its weapons research teams. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown. Syaftyn's national animal is the Cinnamoroll, which is also the nation's favorite main course.

Syaftyn is ranked 291,158^th in the world and 505^th in Starlight for Most Compassionate Citizens, scoring 33.37 on the Kitten Softness Rating.