73%
| Population | 8.528 billion |
| Capital | New London |
| Leader | HC Gabriel Lancaster |
| Faith | Church of the Baker |
| Currency | Crumpet |
| Animal | Eternal Anglo |
The Eminent Bakery of Crumpetopia is a mammoth, orderly nation, ruled by HC Gabriel Lancaster with an iron fist, and notable for its public floggings, complete lack of prisons, and anti-smoking policies. The hard-nosed, cynical, cheerful, devout population of 8.528 billion Crumpetopians are ruled with an iron fist by the dictatorship government, which ensures that no-one outside the party gets too rich. In their personal lives, however, citizens are relatively unoppressed; it remains to be seen whether this is because the government genuinely cares about its people, or if it hasn't gotten around to stamping out civil rights yet.
The medium-sized, corrupt, socially-minded, well-organized government juggles the competing demands of Defense, Education, and Industry. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of New London. The average income tax rate is 99.3%.
The frighteningly efficient Crumpetopian economy, worth a remarkable 3,399 trillion Crumpets a year, is mostly comprised of black market activity, especially in Information Technology, Arms Manufacturing, Tourism, and Beef-Based Agriculture. State-owned companies are common. Average income is an amazing 398,677 Crumpets, and distributed extremely evenly, with practically no difference between the richest and poorest citizens.
Golden statues of Eternal Angloes line the memorial avenues of the Funerary District, preservative manufacturers are told to put a lid on it, the nation's soldiers often believe they're in the Air Force, and nighttime sightings of raccoons sporting Circle-A patches and bandanna masks are on the rise. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a capable police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Crumpetopia's national animal is the Eternal Anglo, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests, and its national religion is Church of the Baker.
Crumpetopia is ranked 1,221st in the world and 9th in Fifth Empire for Highest Average Incomes, with 398,677.07 Standard Monetary Units.
Endorsements Received: 84 » 
Irsfamen, 
Chernistiv, 
Chalybea, 
Serra-Bandy, 
The Iron Stars, 
LVK212, 
Hellghon, 
Heijmskringla, 
Imperium Corporativum Romanum, 
Knights of LUSITANIA, 
Drachen, 
The Korean Papal States, 
E s t r u s, 
Malotihuacan, 
Thorstonia, 
Cruciland, 
Berimania, 
Gray Army, 
Steyrein, 
The Bolivian Socialist Falange, 
Dixie Florida, 
Milkzorzistan, 
United Eurosiberia, 
Mialof, 
Owonyaania, 
AT-M6, 
Routcher, 
Estovlaka, 
Hymperia, 
Far Andainarics, 
The Greater Imperial Russian Empire, 
Rizzman Empire, 
New Fildea, 
Kautas, 
Ichirokuhachi, 
Rhoboeria, 
Senhora dos Mares, 
Zarvice, 
Ost-Scandinavia, 
Tasman Empire, 
Alabamy, 
Chastonia, 
The Agarthans, 
Wirmogengeld, 
Gilgal, 
Naverica, 
Mattirisa, 
Montagway, 
Cartiga, 
Saint Lucian Frostland, and 34 others.
Melimolac, Ynglingasaga, Themision, North Finslisia, Genocidal, Novele Anjou, Sudetenlands, T0rtvga, Eyntsike Erd, Novo-Samara, Santa-Barbara, Asfar, Magna Euboea, Dres Vahn, Minjiang, The Sovereign Heartland Republic, Vonstania, Mallaynn, NeoKad, Kekoslavian Republic, Kelvaros Prime, House Tarkin, Argonnia, Azgoghk, Mecha Rolanda, Arryia, Kleczowka, Kelvenya, Authoritaritan, Simbria, Prussian Socialist Republic, The Children of Gerizim, Norner, and Neu Arbuckle.
National Happenings
Most Recent Government Activity:
- : Following new legislation in
Crumpetopia, nighttime sightings of raccoons sporting Circle-A patches and bandanna masks are on the rise.
- : Following new legislation in Crumpetopia, the nation's soldiers often believe they're in the Air Force.
- : Crumpetopia lodged a message on the Fifth Empire Regional Message Board.
- : Following new legislation in Crumpetopia, preservative manufacturers are told to put a lid on it.
- : Following new legislation in Crumpetopia, golden statues of Eternal Angloes line the memorial avenues of the Funerary District.
- : Following new legislation in Crumpetopia, there's never enough space in space.
- : Crumpetopia was ranked in the Top 1% of the world for Most Corrupt Governments.
- : Crumpetopia was ranked in the Top 1% of the world for Most Corrupt Governments and Best Weather.
- : Following new legislation in Crumpetopia, therapists can always squeeze in another house-call.
- : Following new legislation in Crumpetopia, sleeping on the job is recommended.