The Sanctum Galacticum Imperium of Chastonia is a massive, safe nation, ruled by Karolus imperator IX with an iron fist, and notable for its free-roaming dinosaurs, avowedly heterosexual populace, and compulsory military service. The compassionate, cynical, devout population of 1.955 billion Chastonians are kept under strict control by the oppressive government, which measures its success by the nation's GDP and refers to individual citizens as "human resources."

The large, corrupt, well-organized government juggles the competing demands of Defense, Industry, and Law & Order. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Carolopolis. The average income tax rate is 76.4%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The frighteningly efficient a Chastonian economy, worth 228 trillion Chavs a year, is fairly diversified and led by the Arms Manufacturing industry, with significant contributions from Tourism, Basket Weaving, and Book Publishing. State-owned companies are common. Average income is an impressive 116,640 Chavs, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 2.7 times as much as the poorest.

The jails are alive with the sound of birdsong, government employees have reverted to carrier pigeon due to never-ending virus scans, cricket farmers use magnifying glasses to fit every member of their herd with tiny tracking tags, and most of the population has had bad experiences with hoes. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a very well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Chastonia's national animal is the Accipiter, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests, and its national religion is Bible.

Chastonia is ranked 224,055^th in the world and 2^nd in CTA Foundation for Highest Foreign Aid Spending, scoring -5.48 on the Clooney Contribution Index.