The Federal Republic of Fallgriffin is a gargantuan, efficient nation, ruled by Maj Gen Greogory Twilight with an iron fist, and renowned for its ubiquitous missile silos, zero percent divorce rate, and unlimited-speed roads. The hard-nosed, hard-working, cynical, humorless population of 27.898 billion Fallgriffinians are rabid consumers, partly through choice and partly because the government tells them to and dissenters tend to vanish from their homes at night.

The tiny, corrupt government is primarily concerned with Defense, with Industry, Education, and Law & Order also on the agenda, while Welfare and Spirituality receive no funds. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of South NorthWest East Lawndale. Income tax is unheard of.

The frighteningly efficient Fallgriffinian economy, worth an astonishing 11,647 trillion chromium kaegyds a year, is broadly diversified and led by the Arms Manufacturing industry, with major contributions from Information Technology, Retail, and Uranium Mining. Average income is an amazing 417,497 chromium kaegyds, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 3.6 times as much as the poorest.

Goldilocks has found a lucrative career as a zoning consultant, asylum seekers have voted Fallgriffin as best layover destination, politicians' smiles are legally considered a form of disaster relief, and corporations continue to displace native peoples off their land. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown. Fallgriffin's national animal is the Ferret, which teeters on the brink of extinction due to widespread deforestation, and its national religion is Maj Gen Gregory Twilight warship.

Fallgriffin is ranked 301,892^nd in the world and 2,470^th in the West Pacific for Highest Foreign Aid Spending, scoring -15.49 on the Clooney Contribution Index.