The Most Serene Social Republic of Battadia is a titanic, safe nation, ruled by Hermann Schlott with an even hand, and remarkable for its ban on automobiles, soft-spoken computers, and keen interest in outer space. The compassionate, democratic, cheerful population of 11.821 billion Battadians are fiercely patriotic and enjoy great social equality; they tend to view other, more capitalist countries as somewhat immoral and corrupt.

The enormous, socially-minded government juggles the competing demands of Administration, Education, and Environment. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Saydt. The income tax rate is 100%.

The frighteningly efficient Battadian economy, worth a remarkable 3,609 trillion guiders a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. The industrial sector, which is highly specialized, is mostly made up of the Information Technology industry, with significant contributions from Tourism. Average income is an amazing 305,305 guiders, and distributed extremely evenly, with practically no difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Space has been brought down to earth with constellations of cancer cases across Battadia, criminals are put to death while cuddling their favourite teddy bear, visiting the best Battadian restaurants requires keeping a visa on file, and penny whistles have been rebranded 'tin hornpipes'. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a very well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Battadia's national animal is the bee, which is also the nation's favorite main course.

Battadia is ranked 148^th in the world and 1^st in The Kodiak Republic for Most Accessible, scoring 1,971.2 on the Keller-Reeve Index.