The Glorious Dominion of Beeurdicus is a colossal, orderly nation, ruled by Wilsher Zelk with an iron fist, and notable for its infamous sell-swords, strictly enforced bedtime, and sprawling nuclear power plants. The hard-nosed, cynical, humorless population of 4.455 billion Beeurdicusians are ruled without fear or favor by a psychotic dictator, who outlaws just about everything and refers to the populace as "my little playthings."

The enormous, corrupt, moralistic, socially-minded, well-organized government juggles the competing demands of Defense, Administration, and Education. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Bastion. The average income tax rate is 77.1%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The strong Beeurdicusian economy, worth 377 trillion credits a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. However, for those in the know, there is a large, well-organized black market in Information Technology, Beef-Based Agriculture, Arms Manufacturing, and Uranium Mining. The private sector mostly consists of enterprising ten-year-olds selling lemonade on the sidewalk, but the government is looking at stamping this out. Average income is 84,611 credits, and distributed extremely evenly, with little difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Weird kids who eat bugs are breaking the law, hazmat suits are a common Beeurdicusian garb, remote-control hang-gliding scarecrows patrol the skies to keep songbirds from leaving the nation's borders, and men are enrolling into lady etiquette courses. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Beeurdicus's national animal is the giant crab, which frolics freely in the nation's sparkling oceans.

Beeurdicus is ranked 249,263^rd in the world and 2,079^th in the West Pacific for Most Primitive, scoring -127.75 on the Scary Big Number Scale.