The Most Serene Republic of Battadia is a colossal, environmentally stunning nation, ruled by Hermann Schlott with an even hand, and remarkable for its state-planned economy, irreverence towards religion, and devotion to social welfare. The compassionate, cheerful population of 6.907 billion Battadians are fiercely patriotic and enjoy great social equality; they tend to view other, more capitalist countries as somewhat immoral and corrupt.

The enormous, socially-minded government juggles the competing demands of Administration, Education, and Environment. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Saydt. The income tax rate is 100%.

The frighteningly efficient Battadian economy, worth a remarkable 1,601 trillion guiders a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. The industrial sector, which is highly specialized, is mostly made up of the Information Technology industry, with significant contributions from Tourism and Book Publishing. Average income is an amazing 231,936 guiders, and distributed extremely evenly, with practically no difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

An increasing percentage of the population's youth have homosexual parents, literature classes frequently go on field trips to rock concerts, women who walk into the ladies' changing room are accused of being Peeping Toms, and couples are discouraged from marrying until they can rank their partner on a scale of one to ten. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a very well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Battadia's national animal is the bee, which soars majestically through the nation's famously clear skies.

Battadia is ranked 443^rd in the world and 1^st in The Kodiak Republic for Lowest Crime Rates, with 205.81 law-abiding acts per hour.