The German Kingdom of New Vorarlberg is a gargantuan, efficient nation, ruled by Kaiserin Nathalie with an even hand, and notable for its pith helmet sales, keen interest in outer space, and compulsory military service. The hard-nosed, humorless, devout population of 15.281 billion New Vorarlbergers are fiercely patriotic and enjoy great social equality; they tend to view other, more capitalist countries as somewhat immoral and corrupt.

The medium-sized government juggles the competing demands of Healthcare, Education, and Law & Order. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Bregenz. The average income tax rate is 64.6%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The frighteningly efficient New Vorarlbergian economy, worth a remarkable 1,854 trillion Euros a year, is fairly diversified and led by the Tourism industry, with major contributions from Arms Manufacturing, Book Publishing, and Basket Weaving. State-owned companies are common. Average income is an impressive 121,362 Euros, and distributed extremely evenly, with little difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Government debts are financed through alchemy, the government has officially clarified that "wee on your hands to save time" does not count as proper hygiene, evenings at university debating societies often end with everyone acknowledging both sides may well be right, and doctors accused of having no heart reply that cardiology isn't their speciality. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. New Vorarlberg's national animal is the Austrian Eagle, which soars majestically through the nation's famously clear skies, and its national religion is Christianity.

New Vorarlberg is ranked 279,480^th in the world and 1,422^nd in Europe for Nicest Citizens, with 0.38 average smiles per day.