The People's Republic of Impale is a mid-sized, safe nation, notable for its ubiquitous missile silos, parental licensing program, and stringent health and safety legislation. The compassionate, democratic population of 50 million Impaleans are free to do what they want with their own bodies, and vote for whomever they like in elections; if they go into business, however, they are regulated to within an inch of their lives.

The large, socially-minded, outspoken government juggles the competing demands of Education, Welfare, and Defense. The average income tax rate is 70.5%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The sizeable but underdeveloped Impalean economy, worth 2.00 trillion Industrial Marks a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. The industrial sector, which is fairly diversified, is led by the Beef-Based Agriculture industry, with major contributions from Tourism, Information Technology, and Uranium Mining. Average income is 39,909 Industrial Marks, and distributed extremely evenly, with practically no difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Farting etiquette is taught in schools, finders keepers is the law of the land, mathematics majors learn about new ways to model their crushing debt, and politicians "baring all" for the camera isn't always a figure of speech. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a capable police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Impale's national animal is the Iron Elk, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests.

Impale is ranked 105,071^st in the world and 4,916^th in Lazarus for Most Cultured, scoring 66 on the Snufflebottom-Wiggendum Pentatonic Scale.