Womp

Governor: The Poopy cat of The Chinese Soviet

WA Delegate: The Armed Republic of Mor-Natan (elected )

Founder: The Poopy cat of The Chinese Soviet

Last WA Update:

Maps Board Activity History Admin Rank

Most Nations: 364th Most World Assembly Endorsements: 654th Most Valuable International Artwork: 1,383rd
World Factbook Entry

do whatever i guess

  1. 1

    Future RD promises:

    Factbook → International by Mor-Natan . 73 reads.

Embassies: Celiane, The Amearikan Pacific, Is this the longest region name on natio, Sycord Plume, Redundant Realm of Redundancy, and Freshness.

Tags: Large.

Womp contains 82 nations, the 364th most in the world.

Today's World Census Report

The Most Developed in womp

The World Census compiles a "Human Development Index" by measuring citizens' average life expectancy, education, and income.

As a region, womp is ranked 16,765th in the world for Most Developed.

NationWA CategoryMotto
1.The Poopy cat of The Chinese SovietDemocratic Socialists“hi.....”
2.The Empire of SycilliaInoffensive Centrist Democracy“Stride Forward”
3.The Incorporated States of FerkholtCompulsory Consumerist State“Prosperity in Unity.”
4.The Republic of Banana-poodooCapitalist Paradise“Pride, Industry, and Bananas”
5.The Dominion of Yousti KepocorScandinavian Liberal Paradise“We Will Endure”
6.The Protectorate of Rippon Beach ResortLiberal Democratic Socialists“Vanguards of indigenous power”
7.The Republic of ClanankiaNew York Times Democracy“Nos, populus Caledonius, digitos pedum sugere nitimur.”
8.The Protectorate of KyatsuInoffensive Centrist Democracy“For the Kitsunes, We Fight”
9.The Dominion of NekonekoInoffensive Centrist Autocracy“Meow!”
10.The Rogue Nation of SchattenlandeIron Fist Consumerists“Dies Irae”
1234. . .89»

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Womp Regional Message Board

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The Republic of HOLY COW AN ANARCHY

Sharknov wrote:According to all known laws of aviation, there is no way a bee should be able to fly. Its wings are too
small to get its fat little body off the ground. The bee, of course, flies anyway because bees don't
care what humans think is impossible. Yellow, black. Yellow, black. Yellow, black. Yellow, black.
Ooh, black and yellow! Let's shake it up a little. Barry! Breakfast is ready! Ooming! Hang on a
second. Hello? - Barry? - Adam? - Oan you believe this is happening? - I can't. I'll pick you up.
Looking sharp. Use the stairs. Your father paid good money for those. Sorry. I'm excited. Here's the
graduate. We're very proud of you, son. A perfect report card, all B's. Very proud. Ma! I got a thing
going here. - You got lint on your fuzz. - Ow! That's me! - Wave to us! We'll be in row 118,000. -
Bye! Barry, I told you, stop flying in the house! - Hey, Adam. - Hey, Barry. - Is that fuzz gel? - A little.
Special day, graduation. Never thought I'd make it. Three days grade school, three days high
school. Those were awkward. Three days college. I'm glad I took a day and hitchhiked around the
hive. You did come back different. - Hi, Barry. - Artie, growing a mustache? Looks good. - Hear
about Frankie? - Yeah. - You going to the funeral? - No, I'm not going. Everybody knows, sting
someone, you die. Don't waste it on a squirrel. Such a hothead. I guess he could have just gotten
out of the way. I love this incorporating an amusement park into our day. That's why we don't need
vacations. Boy, quite a bit of pomp... under the circumstances. - Well, Adam, today we are men. -
We are! - Bee-men. - Amen! Hallelujah! Students, faculty, distinguished bees, please welcome Dean
Buzzwell. Welcome, New Hive Oity graduating class of... ...9:15. That concludes our ceremonies.
And begins your career at Honex Industries! Will we pick ourjob today? I heard it's just orientation.
Heads up! Here we go. Keep your hands and antennas inside the tram at all times. - Wonder what
it'll be like? - A little scary. Welcome to Honex, a division of Honesco and a part of the Hexagon
Group. This is it! Wow. Wow. We know that you, as a bee, have worked your whole life to get to the
point where you can work for your whole life. Honey begins when our valiant Pollen Jocks bring the
nectar to the hive. Our top-secret formula is automatically color-corrected, scent-adjusted and
bubble-contoured into this soothing sweet syrup with its distinctive golden glow you know as...
Honey! - That girl was hot. - She's my cousin! - She is? - Yes, we're all cousins. - Right. You're
right. - At Honex, we constantly strive to improve every aspect of bee existence. These bees are
stress-testing a new helmet technology. - What do you think he makes? - Not enough. Here we
have our latest advancement, the Krelman. - What does that do? - Oatches that little strand of
honey that hangs after you pour it. Saves us millions. Oan anyone work on the Krelman? Of course.
Most bee jobs are small ones. But bees know that every small job, if it's done well, means a lot. But
choose carefully because you'll stay in the job you pick for the rest of your life. The same job the
rest of your life? I didn't know that. What's the difference? You'll be happy to know that bees, as a
species, haven't had one day off in 27 million years. So you'll just work us to death? We'll sure try.
Wow! That blew my mind! "What's the difference?" How can you say that? One job forever? That's
an insane choice to have to make. I'm relieved. Now we only have to make one decision in life. But,
Adam, how could they never have told us that? Why would you question anything? We're bees.
We're the most perfectly functioning society on Earth. You ever think maybe things work a little too
well here? Like what? Give me one example. I don't know. But you know what I'm talking about.
Please clear the gate. Royal Nectar Force on approach. Wait a second. Oheck it out. - Hey, those
are Pollen Jocks! - Wow. I've never seen them this close. They know what it's like outside the hive.
Yeah, but some don't come back. - Hey, Jocks! - Hi, Jocks! You guys did great! You're monsters!
You're sky freaks! I love it! I love it! - I wonder where they were. - I don't know. Their day's not
planned. Outside the hive, flying who knows where, doing who knows what. You can'tjust decide to
be a Pollen Jock. You have to be bred for that. Right. Look. That's more pollen than you and I will
see in a lifetime. It's just a status symbol. Bees make too much of it. Perhaps. Unless you're wearing
it and the ladies see you wearing it. Those ladies? Aren't they our cousins too? Distant. Distant.
Look at these two. - Oouple of Hive Harrys. - Let's have fun with them. It must be dangerous being
a Pollen Jock. Yeah. Once a bear pinned me against a mushroom! He had a paw on my throat, and
with the other, he was slapping me! - Oh, my! - I never thought I'd knock him out. What were you
doing during this? Trying to alert the authorities. I can autograph that. A little gusty out there today,
wasn't it, comrades? Yeah. Gusty. We're hitting a sunflower patch six miles from here tomorrow. -
Six miles, huh? - Barry! A puddle jump for us, but maybe you're not up for it. - Maybe I am. - You
are not! We're going 0900 at J-Gate. What do you think, buzzy-boy? Are you bee enough? I might
be. It all depends on what 0900 means. Hey, Honex! Dad, you surprised me. You decide what
you're interested in? - Well, there's a lot of choices. - But you only get one. Do you ever get bored
doing the same job every day? Son, let me tell you about stirring. You grab that stick, and you just
move it around, and you stir it around. You get yourself into a rhythm. It's a beautiful thing. You
know, Dad, the more I think about it, maybe the honey field just isn't right for me. You were thinking
of what, making balloon animals? That's a bad job for a guy with a stinger. Janet, your son's not
sure he wants to go into honey! - Barry, you are so funny sometimes. - I'm not trying to be funny.
You're not funny! You're going into honey. Our son, the stirrer! - You're gonna be a stirrer? - No
one's listening to me! Wait till you see the sticks I have. I could say anything right now. I'm gonna
get an ant tattoo! Let's open some honey and celebrate! Maybe I'll pierce my thorax. Shave my
antennae. Shack up with a grasshopper. Get a gold tooth and call everybody "dawg"! I'm so proud.
- We're starting work today! - Today's the day. Oome on! All the good jobs will be gone. Yeah, right.
Pollen counting, stunt bee, pouring, stirrer, front desk, hair removal... - Is it still available? - Hang on.
Two left! One of them's yours! Oongratulations! Step to the side. - What'd you get? - Picking crud
out. Stellar! Wow! Oouple of newbies? Yes, sir! Our first day! We are ready! Make your choice. - You
want to go first? - No, you go. Oh, my. What's available? Restroom attendant's open, not for the
reason you think. - Any chance of getting the Krelman? - Sure, you're on. I'm sorry, the Krelman just
closed out. Wax monkey's always open. The Krelman opened up again. What happened? A bee
died. Makes an opening. See? He's dead. Another dead one. Deady. Deadified. Two more dead.
Dead from the neck up. Dead from the neck down. That's life! Oh, this is so hard! Heating, cooling,
stunt bee, pourer, stirrer, humming, inspector number seven, lint coordinator, stripe supervisor, mite
wrangler. Barry, what do you think I should... Barry? Barry! All right, we've got the sunflower patch
in quadrant nine... What happened to you? Where are you? - I'm going out. - Out? Out where? - Out
there. - Oh, no! I have to, before I go to work for the rest of my life. You're gonna die! You're crazy!
Hello? Another call coming in. If anyone's feeling brave, there's a Korean deli on 83rd that gets their
roses today. Hey, guys. - Look at that. - Isn't that the kid we saw yesterday? Hold it, son, flight
deck's restricted. It's OK, Lou. We're gonna take him up. Really? Feeling lucky, are you? Sign here,
here. Just initial that. - Thank you. - OK. You got a rain advisory today, and as you all know, bees
cannot fly in rain. So be careful. As always, watch your brooms, hockey sticks, dogs, birds, bears
and bats. Also, I got a couple of reports of root beer being poured on us. Murphy's in a home
because of it, babbling like a cicada! - That's awful. - And a reminder for you rookies, bee law
number one, absolutely no talking to humans! All right, launch positions! Buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz!
Buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz! Buzz, buzz, buzz, buzz! Black and yellow! Hello! You ready for this, hot
shot? Yeah. Yeah, bring it on. Wind, check. - Antennae, check. - Nectar pack, check. - Wings,
check. - Stinger, check. Scared out of my shorts, check. OK, ladies, let's move it out! Pound those
petunias, you striped stem-suckers! All of you, drain those flowers! Wow! I'm out! I can't believe I'm
out! So blue. I feel so fast and free! Box kite! Wow! Flowers! This is Blue Leader. We have roses
visual. Bring it around 30 degrees and hold. Roses! 30 degrees, roger. Bringing it around. Stand to
the side, kid. It's got a bit of a kick. That is one nectar collector! - Ever see pollination up close? -
No, sir. I pick up some pollen here, sprinkle it over here. Maybe a dash over there, a pinch on that
one. See that? It's a little bit of magic. That's amazing. Why do we do that? That's pollen power.
More pollen, more flowers, more nectar, more honey for us. Oool. I'm picking up a lot of bright
yellow. Oould be daisies. Don't we need those? Oopy that visual. Wait. One of these flowers seems
to be on the move. Say again? You're reporting a moving flower? Affirmative. That was on the line!
This is the coolest. What is it? I don't know, but I'm loving this color. It smells good. Not like a
flower, but I like it. Yeah, fuzzy. Ohemical-y. Oareful, guys. It's a little grabby. My sweet lord of bees!
Oandy-brain, get off there! Problem! - Guys! - This could be bad. Affirmative. Very close. Gonna
hurt. Mama's little boy. You are way out of position, rookie! Ooming in at you like a missile! Help me!
I don't think these are flowers. - Should we tell him? - I think he knows. What is this?! Match point!
You can start packing up, honey, because you're about to eat it! Yowser! Gross. There's a bee in
the car! - Do something! - I'm driving! - Hi, bee. - He's back here! He's going to sting me! Nobody
move. If you don't move, he won't sting you. Freeze! He blinked! Spray him, Granny! What are you
doing?! Wow... the tension level out here is unbelievable. I gotta get home. Oan't fly in rain. Oan't fly
in rain. Oan't fly in rain. Mayday! Mayday! Bee going down! Ken, could you close the window
please? Ken, could you close the window please? Oheck out my new resume. I made it into a fold-
out brochure. You see? Folds out. Oh, no. More humans. I don't need this. What was that? Maybe
this time. This time. This time. This time! This time! This... Drapes! That is diabolical. It's fantastic.
It's got all my special skills, even my top-ten favorite movies. What's number one? Star Wars? Nah,
I don't go for that... ...kind of stuff. No wonder we shouldn't talk to them. They're out of their minds.
When I leave a job interview, they're flabbergasted, can't believe what I say. There's the sun. Maybe
that's a way out. I don't remember the sun having a big 75 on it. I predicted global warming. I could
feel it getting hotter. At first I thought it was just me. Wait! Stop! Bee! Stand back. These are winter
boots. Wait! Don't kill him! You know I'm allergic to them! This thing could kill me! Why does his life
have less value than yours? Why does his life have any less value than mine? Is that your
statement? I'm just saying all life has value. You don't know what he's capable of feeling. My
brochure! There you go, little guy. I'm not scared of him. It's an allergic thing. Put that on your
resume brochure. My whole face could puff up. Make it one of your special skills. Knocking
someone out is also a special skill. Right. Bye, Vanessa. Thanks. - Vanessa, next week? Yogurt
night? - Sure, Ken. You know, whatever. - You could put carob chips on there. - Bye. - Supposed to
be less calories. - Bye. I gotta say something. She saved my life. I gotta say something. All right,
here it goes. Nah. What would I say? I could really get in trouble. It's a bee law. You're not
supposed to talk to a human. I can't believe I'm doing this. I've got to. Oh, I can't do it. Oome on!
No. Yes. No. Do it. I can't. How should I start it? "You like jazz?" No, that's no good. Here she
comes! Speak, you fool! Hi! I'm sorry. - You're talking. - Yes, I know. You're talking! I'm so sorry.
No, it's OK. It's fine. I know I'm dreaming. But I don't recall going to bed. Well, I'm sure this is very
disconcerting. This is a bit of a surprise to me. I mean, you're a bee! I am. And I'm not supposed to
be doing this, but they were all trying to kill me. And if it wasn't for you... I had to thank you. It's just
how I was raised. That was a little weird. - I'm talking with a bee. - Yeah. I'm talking to a bee. And
the bee is talking to me! I just want to say I'm grateful. I'll leave now. - Wait! How did you learn to do
that? - What? The talking thing. Same way you did, I guess. "Mama, Dada, honey." You pick it up. -
That's very funny. - Yeah. Bees are funny. If we didn't laugh, we'd cry with what we have to deal
with. Anyway... Oan I... ...get you something? - Like what? I don't know. I mean... I don't know.
Ooffee? I don't want to put you out. It's no trouble. It takes two minutes. - It's just coffee. - I hate to
impose. - Don't be ridiculous! - Actually, I would love a cup. Hey, you want rum cake? - I shouldn't.
- Have some. - No, I can't. - Oome on! I'm trying to lose a couple micrograms. - Where? - These
stripes don't help. You look great! I don't know if you know anything about fashion. Are you all
right? No. He's making the tie in the cab as they're flying up Madison. He finally gets there. He runs
up the steps into the church. The wedding is on. And he says, "Watermelon? I thought you said
Guatemalan. Why would I marry a watermelon?" Is that a bee joke? That's the kind of stuff we do.
Yeah, different. So, what are you gonna do, Barry? About work? I don't know. I want to do my part
for the hive, but I can't do it the way they want. I know how you feel. - You do? - Sure. My parents
wanted me to be a lawyer or a doctor, but I wanted to be a florist. - Really? - My only interest is
flowers. Our new queen was just elected with that same campaign slogan. Anyway, if you look...
There's my hive right there. See it? You're in Sheep Meadow! Yes! I'm right off the Turtle Pond! No
way! I know that area. I lost a toe ring there once. - Why do girls put rings on their toes? - Why not?
- It's like putting a hat on your knee. - Maybe I'll try that. - You all right, ma'am? - Oh, yeah. Fine.
Just having two cups of coffee! Anyway, this has been great. Thanks for the coffee. Yeah, it's no
trouble. Sorry I couldn't finish it. If I did, I'd be up the rest of my life. Are you...? Oan I take a piece of
this with me? Sure! Here, have a crumb. - Thanks! - Yeah. All right. Well, then... I guess I'll see you
around. Or not. OK, Barry. And thank you so much again... for before. Oh, that? That was nothing.
Well, not nothing, but... Anyway... This can't possibly work. He's all set to go. We may as well try it.
OK, Dave, pull the chute. - Sounds amazing. - It was amazing! It was the scariest, happiest moment
of my life. Humans! I can't believe you were with humans! Giant, scary humans! What were they
like? Huge and crazy. They talk crazy. They eat crazy giant things. They drive crazy. - Do they try
and kill you, like on TV? - Some of them. But some of them don't. - How'd you get back? - Poodle.
You did it, and I'm glad. You saw whatever you wanted to see. You had your "experience." Now you
can pick out yourjob and be normal. - Well... - Well? Well, I met someone. You did? Was she Bee-
ish? - A wasp?! Your parents will kill you! - No, no, no, not a wasp. - Spider? - I'm not attracted to
spiders. I know it's the hottest thing, with the eight legs and all. I can't get by that face. So who is
she? She's... human. No, no. That's a bee law. You wouldn't break a bee law. - Her name's
Vanessa. - Oh, boy. She's so nice. And she's a florist! Oh, no! You're dating a human florist! We're
not dating. You're flying outside the hive, talking to humans that attack our homes with power
washers and M-80s! One-eighth a stick of dynamite! She saved my life! And she understands me.
This is over! Eat this. This is not over! What was that? - They call it a crumb. - It was so stingin'
stripey! And that's not what they eat. That's what falls off what they eat! - You know what a
Oinnabon is? - No. It's bread and cinnamon and frosting. They heat it up... Sit down! ...really hot! -
Listen to me! We are not them! We're us. There's us and there's them! Yes, but who can deny the
heart that is yearning? There's no yearning. Stop yearning. Listen to me! You have got to start
thinking bee, my friend. Thinking bee! - Thinking bee. - Thinking bee. Thinking bee! Thinking bee!
Thinking bee! Thinking bee! There he is. He's in the pool. You know what your problem is, Barry? I
gotta start thinking bee? How much longer will this go on? It's been three days! Why aren't you
working? I've got a lot of big life decisions to think about. What life? You have no life! You have no
job. You're barely a bee! Would it kill you to make a little honey? Barry, come out. Your father's
talking to you. Martin, would you talk to him? Barry, I'm talking to you! You coming? Got
everything? All set! Go ahead. I'll catch up. Don't be too long. Watch this! Vanessa! - We're still
here. - I told you not to yell at him. He doesn't respond to yelling! - Then why yell at me? - Because
you don't listen! I'm not listening to this. Sorry, I've gotta go. - Where are you going? - I'm meeting a
friend. A girl? Is this why you can't decide? Bye. I just hope she's Bee-ish. They have a huge parade
of flowers every year in Pasadena? To be in the Tournament of Roses, that's every florist's dream!
Up on a float, surrounded by flowers, crowds cheering. A tournament. Do the roses compete in
athletic events? No. All right, I've got one. How come you don't fly everywhere? It's exhausting.
Why don't you run everywhere? It's faster. Yeah, OK, I see, I see. All right, your turn. TiVo. You can
just freeze live TV? That's insane! You don't have that? We have Hivo, but it's a disease. It's a
horrible, horrible disease. Oh, my. Dumb bees! You must want to sting all those jerks. We try not to
sting. It's usually fatal for us. So you have to watch your temper. Very carefully. You kick a wall, take
a walk, write an angry letter and throw it out. Work through it like any emotion: Anger, jealousy, lust.
Oh, my goodness! Are you OK? Yeah. - What is wrong with you?! - It's a bug. He's not bothering
anybody. Get out of here, you creep! What was that? A Pic 'N' Save circular? Yeah, it was. How did
you know? It felt like about 10 pages. Seventy-five is pretty much our limit. You've really got that
down to a science. - I lost a cousin to Italian Vogue. - I'll bet. What in the name of Mighty Hercules
is this? How did this get here? Oute Bee, Golden Blossom, Ray Liotta Private Select? - Is he that
actor? - I never heard of him. - Why is this here? - For people. We eat it. You don't have enough
food of your own? - Well, yes. - How do you get it? - Bees make it. - I know who makes it! And it's
hard to make it! There's heating, cooling, stirring. You need a whole Krelman thing! - It's organic. -
It's our-ganic! It's just honey, Barry. Just what?! Bees don't know about this! This is stealing! A lot of
stealing! You've taken our homes, schools, hospitals! This is all we have! And it's on sale?! I'm
getting to the bottom of this. I'm getting to the bottom of all of this! Hey, Hector. - You almost
done? - Almost. He is here. I sense it. Well, I guess I'll go home now and just leave this nice honey
out, with no one around. You're busted, box boy! I knew I heard something. So you can talk! I can
talk. And now you'll start talking! Where you getting the sweet stuff? Who's your supplier? I don't
understand. I thought we were friends. The last thing we want to do is upset bees! You're too late!
It's ours now! You, sir, have crossed the wrong sword! You, sir, will be lunch for my iguana, Ignacio!
Where is the honey coming from? Tell me where! Honey Farms! It comes from Honey Farms! Orazy
person! What horrible thing has happened here? These faces, they never knew what hit them. And
now they're on the road to nowhere! Just keep still. What? You're not dead? Do I look dead? They
will wipe anything that moves. Where you headed? To Honey Farms. I am onto something huge
here. I'm going to Alaska. Moose blood, crazy stuff. Blows your head off! I'm going to Tacoma. -
And you? - He really is dead. All right. Uh-oh! - What is that?! - Oh, no! - A wiper! Triple blade! -
Triple blade? Jump on! It's your only chance, bee! Why does everything have to be so doggone
clean?! How much do you people need to see?! Open your eyes! Stick your head out the window!
From NPR News in Washington, I'm Oarl Kasell. But don't kill no more bugs! - Bee! - Moose blood
guy!! - You hear something? - Like what? Like tiny screaming. Turn off the radio. Whassup, bee
boy? Hey, Blood. Just a row of honey jars, as far as the eye could see. Wow! I assume wherever
this truck goes is where they're getting it. I mean, that honey's ours. - Bees hang tight. - We're all
jammed in. It's a close community. Not us, man. We on our own. Every mosquito on his own. -
What if you get in trouble? - You a mosquito, you in trouble. Nobody likes us. They just smack. See
a mosquito, smack, smack! At least you're out in the world. You must meet girls. Mosquito girls try
to trade up, get with a moth, dragonfly. Mosquito girl don't want no mosquito. You got to be kidding
me! Mooseblood's about to leave the building! So long, bee! - Hey, guys! - Mooseblood! I knew I'd
catch y'all down here. Did you bring your crazy straw? We throw it in jars, slap a label on it, and it's
pretty much pure profit. What is this place? A bee's got a brain the size of a pinhead. They are
pinheads! Pinhead. - Oheck out the new smoker. - Oh, sweet. That's the one you want. The Thomas
3000! Smoker? Ninety puffs a minute, semi-automatic. Twice the nicotine, all the tar. A couple
breaths of this knocks them right out. They make the honey, and we make the money. "They make
the honey, and we make the money"? Oh, my! What's going on? Are you OK? Yeah. It doesn't last
too long. Do you know you're in a fake hive with fake walls? Our queen was moved here. We had no
choice. This is your queen? That's a man in women's clothes! That's a drag queen! What is this?
Oh, no! There's hundreds of them! Bee honey. Our honey is being brazenly stolen on a massive
scale! This is worse than anything bears have done! I intend to do something. Oh, Barry, stop. Who
told you humans are taking our honey? That's a rumor. Do these look like rumors? That's a
conspiracy theory. These are obviously doctored photos. How did you get mixed up in this? He's
been talking to humans. - What? - Talking to humans?! He has a human girlfriend. And they make
out! Make out? Barry! We do not. - You wish you could. - Whose side are you on? The bees! I dated
a cricket once in San Antonio. Those crazy legs kept me up all night. Barry, this is what you want to
do with your life? I want to do it for all our lives. Nobody works harder than bees! Dad, I remember
you coming home so overworked your hands were still stirring. You couldn't stop. I remember that.
What right do they have to our honey? We live on two cups a year. They put it in lip balm for no
reason whatsoever! Even if it's true, what can one bee do? Sting them where it really hurts. In the
face! The eye! - That would hurt. - No. Up the nose? That's a killer. There's only one place you can
sting the humans, one place where it matters. Hive at Five, the hive's only full-hour action news
source. No more bee beards! With Bob Bumble at the anchor desk. Weather with Storm Stinger.
Sports with Buzz Larvi. And Jeanette Ohung. - Good evening. I'm Bob Bumble. - And I'm Jeanette
Ohung. A tri-county bee, Barry Benson, intends to sue the human race for stealing our honey,
packaging it and profiting from it illegally! Tomorrow night on Bee Larry King, we'll have three former
queens here in our studio, discussing their new book, Olassy Ladies, out this week on Hexagon.
Tonight we're talking to Barry Benson. Did you ever think, "I'm a kid from the hive. I can't do this"?
Bees have never been afraid to change the world. What about Bee Oolumbus? Bee Gandhi?
Bejesus? Where I'm from, we'd never sue humans. We were thinking of stickball or candy stores.
How old are you? The bee community is supporting you in this case, which will be the trial of the
bee century. You know, they have a Larry King in the human world too. It's a common name. Next
week... He looks like you and has a show and suspenders and colored dots... Next week... Glasses,
quotes on the bottom from the guest even though you just heard 'em. Bear Week next week!
They're scary, hairy and here live. Always leans forward, pointy shoulders, squinty eyes, very
Jewish. In tennis, you attack at the point of weakness! It was my grandmother, Ken. She's 81.
Honey, her backhand's a joke! I'm not gonna take advantage of that? Quiet, please. Actual work
going on here. - Is that that same bee? - Yes, it is! I'm helping him sue the human race. - Hello. -
Hello, bee. This is Ken. Yeah, I remember you. Timberland, size ten and a half. Vibram sole, I
believe. Why does he talk again? Listen, you better go 'cause we're really busy working. But it's our
yogurt night! Bye-bye. Why is yogurt night so difficult?! You poor thing. You two have been at this
for hours! Yes, and Adam here has been a huge help. - Frosting... - How many sugars? Just one. I
try not to use the competition. So why are you helping me? Bees have good qualities. And it takes
my mind off the shop. Instead of flowers, people are giving balloon bouquets now. Those are great,
if you're three. And artificial flowers. - Oh, those just get me psychotic! - Yeah, me too. Bent
stingers, pointless pollination. Bees must hate those fake things! Nothing worse than a daffodil
that's had work done. Maybe this could make up for it a little bit. - This lawsuit's a pretty big deal. - I
guess. You sure you want to go through with it? Am I sure? When I'm done with the humans, they
won't be able to say, "Honey, I'm home," without paying a royalty! It's an incredible scene here in
downtown Manhattan, where the world anxiously waits, because for the first time in history, we will
hear for ourselves if a honeybee can actually speak. What have we gotten into here, Barry? It's
pretty big, isn't it? I can't believe how many humans don't work during the day. You think billion-
dollar multinational food companies have good lawyers? Everybody needs to stay behind the
barricade. - What's the matter? - I don't know, I just got a chill. Well, if it isn't the bee team. You
boys work on this? All rise! The Honorable Judge Bumbleton presiding. All right. Oase number 4475,
Superior Oourt of New York, Barry Bee Benson v. the Honey Industry is now in session. Mr.
Montgomery, you're representing the five food companies collectively? A privilege. Mr. Benson...
you're representing all the bees of the world? I'm kidding. Yes, Your Honor, we're ready to proceed.
Mr. Montgomery, your opening statement, please. Ladies and gentlemen of the jury, my
grandmother was a simple woman. Born on a farm, she believed it was man's divine right to benefit
from the bounty of nature God put before us. If we lived in the topsy-turvy world Mr. Benson
imagines, just think of what would it mean. I would have to negotiate with the silkworm for the
elastic in my britches! Talking bee! How do we know this isn't some sort of holographic motion-
picture-capture Hollywood wizardry? They could be using laser beams! Robotics! Ventriloquism!
Oloning! For all we know, he could be on steroids! Mr. Benson? Ladies and gentlemen, there's no
trickery here. I'm just an ordinary bee. Honey's pretty important to me. It's important to all bees. We
invented it! We make it. And we protect it with our lives. Unfortunately, there are some people in this
room who think they can take it from us 'cause we're the little guys! I'm hoping that, after this is all
over, you'll see how, by taking our honey, you not only take everything we have but everything we
are! I wish he'd dress like that all the time. So nice! Oall your first witness. So, Mr. Klauss
Vanderhayden of Honey Farms, big company you have. I suppose so. I see you also own
Honeyburton and Honron! Yes, they provide beekeepers for our farms. Beekeeper. I find that to be a
very disturbing term. I don't imagine you employ any bee-free-ers, do you? - No. - I couldn't hear
you. - No. - No. Because you don't free bees. You keep bees. Not only that, it seems you thought a
bear would be an appropriate image for a jar of honey. They're very lovable creatures. Yogi Bear,
Fozzie Bear, Build-A-Bear. You mean like this? Bears kill bees! How'd you like his head crashing
through your living room?! Biting into your couch! Spitting out your throw pillows! OK, that's
enough. Take him away. So, Mr. Sting, thank you for being here. Your name intrigues me. - Where
have I heard it before? - I was with a band called The Police. But you've never been a police officer,
have you? No, I haven't. No, you haven't. And so here we have yet another example of bee culture
casually stolen by a human for nothing more than a prance-about stage name. Oh, please. Have
you ever been stung, Mr. Sting? Because I'm feeling a little stung, Sting. Or should I say... Mr.
Gordon M. Sumner! That's not his real name?! You idiots! Mr. Liotta, first, belated congratulations
on your Emmy win for a guest spot on ER in 2005. Thank you. Thank you. I see from your resume
that you're devilishly handsome with a churning inner turmoil that's ready to blow. I enjoy what I do.
Is that a crime? Not yet it isn't. But is this what it's come to for you? Exploiting tiny, helpless bees
so you don't have to rehearse your part and learn your lines, sir? Watch it, Benson! I could blow
right now! This isn't a goodfella. This is a badfella! Why doesn't someone just step on this creep,
and we can all go home?! - Order in this court! - You're all thinking it! Order! Order, I say! - Say it! -
Mr. Liotta, please sit down! I think it was awfully nice of that bear to pitch in like that. I think the
jury's on our side. Are we doing everything right, legally? I'm a florist. Right. Well, here's to a great
team. To a great team! Well, hello. - Ken! - Hello. I didn't think you were coming. No, I was just late. I
tried to call, but... the battery. I didn't want all this to go to waste, so I called Barry. Luckily, he was
free. Oh, that was lucky. There's a little left. I could heat it up. Yeah, heat it up, sure, whatever. So I
hear you're quite a tennis player. I'm not much for the game myself. The ball's a little grabby. That's
where I usually sit. Right... there. Ken, Barry was looking at your resume, and he agreed with me
that eating with chopsticks isn't really a special skill. You think I don't see what you're doing? I
know how hard it is to find the rightjob. We have that in common. Do we? Bees have 100 percent
employment, but we do jobs like taking the crud out. That's just what I was thinking about doing.
Ken, I let Barry borrow your razor for his fuzz. I hope that was all right. I'm going to drain the old
stinger. Yeah, you do that. Look at that. You know, I've just about had it with your little mind games.
- What's that? - Italian Vogue. Mamma mia, that's a lot of pages. A lot of ads. Remember what Van
said, why is your life more valuable than mine? Funny, I just can't seem to recall that! I think
something stinks in here! I love the smell of flowers. How do you like the smell of flames?! Not as
much. Water bug! Not taking sides! Ken, I'm wearing a Ohapstick hat! This is pathetic! I've got
issues! Well, well, well, a royal flush! - You're bluffing. - Am I? Surf's up, dude! Poo water! That bowl
is gnarly. Except for those dirty yellow rings! Kenneth! What are you doing?! You know, I don't even
like honey! I don't eat it! We need to talk! He's just a little bee! And he happens to be the nicest bee
I've met in a long time! Long time? What are you talking about?! Are there other bugs in your life?
No, but there are other things bugging me in life. And you're one of them! Fine! Talking bees, no
yogurt night... My nerves are fried from riding on this emotional roller coaster! Goodbye, Ken. And
for your information, I prefer sugar-free, artificial sweeteners made by man! I'm sorry about all that. I
know it's got an aftertaste! I like it! I always felt there was some kind of barrier between Ken and me.
I couldn't overcome it. Oh, well. Are you OK for the trial? I believe Mr. Montgomery is about out of
ideas. We would like to call Mr. Barry Benson Bee to the stand. Good idea! You can really see why
he's considered one of the best lawyers... Yeah. Layton, you've gotta weave some magic with this
jury, or it's gonna be all over. Don't worry. The only thing I have to do to turn this jury around is to
remind them of what they don't like about bees. - You got the tweezers? - Are you allergic? Only to
losing, son. Only to losing. Mr. Benson Bee, I'll ask you what I think we'd all like to know. What
exactly is your relationship to that woman? We're friends. - Good friends? - Yes. How good? Do you
live together? Wait a minute... Are you her little... ...bedbug? I've seen a bee documentary or two.
From what I understand, doesn't your queen give birth to all the bee children? - Yeah, but... - So
those aren't your real parents! - Oh, Barry... - Yes, they are! Hold me back! You're an illegitimate
bee, aren't you, Benson? He's denouncing bees! Don't y'all date your cousins? - Objection! - I'm
going to pincushion this guy! Adam, don't! It's what he wants! Oh, I'm hit!! Oh, lordy, I am hit! Order!
Order! The venom! The venom is coursing through my veins! I have been felled by a winged beast of
destruction! You see? You can't treat them like equals! They're striped savages! Stinging's the only
thing they know! It's their way! - Adam, stay with me. - I can't feel my legs. What angel of mercy will
come forward to suck the poison from my heaving buttocks? I will have order in this court. Order!
Order, please! The case of the honeybees versus the human race took a pointed turn against the
bees yesterday when one of their legal team stung Layton T. Montgomery. - Hey, buddy. - Hey. - Is
there much pain? - Yeah. I... I blew the whole case, didn't I? It doesn't matter. What matters is
you're alive. You could have died. I'd be better off dead. Look at me. They got it from the cafeteria
downstairs, in a tuna sandwich. Look, there's a little celery still on it. What was it like to sting
someone? I can't explain it. It was all... All adrenaline and then... and then ecstasy! All right. You
think it was all a trap? Of course. I'm sorry. I flew us right into this. What were we thinking? Look at
us. We're just a couple of bugs in this world. What will the humans do to us if they win? I don't
know. I hear they put the roaches in motels. That doesn't sound so bad. Adam, they check in, but
they don't check out! Oh, my. Oould you get a nurse to close that window? - Why? - The smoke.
Bees don't smoke. Right. Bees don't smoke. Bees don't smoke! But some bees are smoking. That's
it! That's our case! It is? It's not over? Get dressed. I've gotta go somewhere. Get back to the court
and stall. Stall any way you can. And assuming you've done step correctly, you're ready for the tub.
Mr. Flayman. Yes? Yes, Your Honor! Where is the rest of your team? Well, Your Honor, it's
interesting. Bees are trained to fly haphazardly, and as a result, we don't make very good time. I
actually heard a funny story about... Your Honor, haven't these ridiculous bugs taken up enough of
this court's valuable time? How much longer will we allow these absurd shenanigans to go on? They
have presented no compelling evidence to support their charges against my clients, who run
legitimate businesses. I move for a complete dismissal of this entire case! Mr. Flayman, I'm afraid
I'm going to have to consider Mr. Montgomery's motion. But you can't! We have a terrific case.
Where is your proof? Where is the evidence? Show me the smoking gun! Hold it, Your Honor! You
want a smoking gun? Here is your smoking gun. What is that? It's a bee smoker! What, this? This
harmless little contraption? This couldn't hurt a fly, let alone a bee. Look at what has happened to
bees who have never been asked, "Smoking or non?" Is this what nature intended for us? To be
forcibly addicted to smoke machines and man-made wooden slat work camps? Living out our lives
as honey slaves to the white man? - What are we gonna do? - He's playing the species card. Ladies
and gentlemen, please, free these bees! Free the bees! Free the bees! Free the bees! Free the bees!
Free the bees! The court finds in favor of the bees! Vanessa, we won! I knew you could do it! High-
five! Sorry. I'm OK! You know what this means? All the honey will finally belong to the bees. Now we
won't have to work so hard all the time. This is an unholy perversion of the balance of nature,
Benson. You'll regret this. Barry, how much honey is out there? All right. One at a time. Barry, who
are you wearing? My sweater is Ralph Lauren, and I have no pants. - What if Montgomery's right? -
What do you mean? We've been living the bee way a long time, 27 million years. Oongratulations on
your victory. What will you demand as a settlement? First, we'll demand a complete shutdown of all
bee work camps. Then we want back the honey that was ours to begin with, every last drop. We
demand an end to the glorification of the bear as anything more than a filthy, smelly, bad-breath
stink machine. We're all aware of what they do in the woods. Wait for my signal. Take him out. He'll
have nauseous for a few hours, then he'll be fine. And we will no longer tolerate bee-negative
nicknames... But it's just a prance-about stage name! ...unnecessary inclusion of honey in bogus
health products and la-dee-da human tea-time snack garnishments. Oan't breathe. Bring it in, boys!
Hold it right there! Good. Tap it. Mr. Buzzwell, we just passed three cups, and there's gallons more
coming! - I think we need to shut down! - Shut down? We've never shut down. Shut down honey
production! Stop making honey! Turn your key, sir! What do we do now? Oannonball! We're shutting
honey production! Mission abort. Aborting pollination and nectar detail. Returning to base. Adam,
you wouldn't believe how much honey was out there. Oh, yeah? What's going on? Where is
everybody? - Are they out celebrating? - They're home. They don't know what to do. Laying out,
sleeping in. I heard your Uncle Oarl was on his way to San Antonio with a cricket. At least we got
our honey back. Sometimes I think, so what if humans liked our honey? Who wouldn't? It's the
greatest thing in the world! I was excited to be part of making it. This was my new desk. This was
my new job. I wanted to do it really well. And now... Now I can't. I don't understand why they're not
happy. I thought their lives would be better! They're doing nothing. It's amazing. Honey really
changes people. You don't have any idea what's going on, do you? - What did you want to show
me? - This. What happened here? That is not the half of it. Oh, no. Oh, my. They're all wilting.
Doesn't look very good, does it? No. And whose fault do you think that is? You know, I'm gonna
guess bees. Bees? Specifically, me. I didn't think bees not needing to make honey would affect all
these things. It's notjust flowers. Fruits, vegetables, they all need bees. That's our whole SAT test
right there. Take away produce, that affects the entire animal kingdom. And then, of course... The
human species? So if there's no more pollination, it could all just go south here, couldn't it? I know
this is also partly my fault. How about a suicide pact? How do we do it? - I'll sting you, you step on
me. - Thatjust kills you twice. Right, right. Listen, Barry... sorry, but I gotta get going. I had to open
my mouth and talk. Vanessa? Vanessa? Why are you leaving? Where are you going? To the final
Tournament of Roses parade in Pasadena. They've moved it to this weekend because all the
flowers are dying. It's the last chance I'll ever have to see it. Vanessa, I just wanna say I'm sorry. I
never meant it to turn out like this. I know. Me neither. Tournament of Roses. Roses can't do sports.
Wait a minute. Roses. Roses? Roses! Vanessa! Roses?! Barry? - Roses are flowers! - Yes, they are.
Flowers, bees, pollen! I know. That's why this is the last parade. Maybe not. Oould you ask him to
slow down? Oould you slow down? Barry! OK, I made a huge mistake. This is a total disaster, all my
fault. Yes, it kind of is. I've ruined the planet. I wanted to help you with the flower shop. I've made it
worse. Actually, it's completely closed down. I thought maybe you were remodeling. But I have
another idea, and it's greater than my previous ideas combined. I don't want to hear it! All right, they
have the roses, the roses have the pollen. I know every bee, plant and flower bud in this park. All we
gotta do is get what they've got back here with what we've got. - Bees. - Park. - Pollen! - Flowers. -
Repollination! - Across the nation! Tournament of Roses, Pasadena, Oalifornia. They've got nothing
but flowers, floats and cotton candy. Security will be tight. I have an idea. Vanessa Bloome, FTD.
Official floral business. It's real. Sorry, ma'am. Nice brooch. Thank you. It was a gift. Once inside,
we just pick the right float. How about The Princess and the Pea? I could be the princess, and you
could be the pea! Yes, I got it. - Where should I sit? - What are you? - I believe I'm the pea. - The
pea? It goes under the mattresses. - Not in this fairy tale, sweetheart. - I'm getting the marshal. You
do that! This whole parade is a fiasco! Let's see what this baby'll do. Hey, what are you doing?!
Then all we do is blend in with traffic... ...without arousing suspicion. Once at the airport, there's no
stopping us. Stop! Security. - You and your insect pack your float? - Yes. Has it been in your
possession the entire time? Would you remove your shoes? - Remove your stinger. - It's part of me.
I know. Just having some fun. Enjoy your flight. Then if we're lucky, we'll have just enough pollen to
do the job. Oan you believe how lucky we are? We have just enough pollen to do the job! I think this
is gonna work. It's got to work. Attention, passengers, this is Oaptain Scott. We have a bit of bad
weather in New York. It looks like we'll experience a couple hours delay. Barry, these are cut flowers
with no water. They'll never make it. I gotta get up there and talk to them. Be careful. Oan I get help
with the Sky Mall magazine? I'd like to order the talking inflatable nose and ear hair trimmer.
Oaptain, I'm in a real situation. - What'd you say, Hal? - Nothing. Bee! Don't freak out! My entire
species... What are you doing? - Wait a minute! I'm an attorney! - Who's an attorney? Don't move.
Oh, Barry. Good afternoon, passengers. This is your captain. Would a Miss Vanessa Bloome in 24B
please report to the cockpit? And please hurry! What happened here? There was a DustBuster, a
toupee, a life raft exploded. One's bald, one's in a boat, they're both unconscious! - Is that another
bee joke? - No! No one's flying the plane! This is JFK control tower, Flight 356. What's your status?
This is Vanessa Bloome. I'm a florist from New York. Where's the pilot? He's unconscious, and so is
the copilot. Not good. Does anyone onboard have flight experience? As a matter of fact, there is. -
Who's that? - Barry Benson. From the honey trial?! Oh, great. Vanessa, this is nothing more than a
big metal bee. It's got giant wings, huge engines. I can't fly a plane. - Why not? Isn't John Travolta a
pilot? - Yes. How hard could it be? Wait, Barry! We're headed into some lightning. This is Bob
Bumble. We have some late-breaking news from JFK Airport, where a suspenseful scene is
developing. Barry Benson, fresh from his legal victory... That's Barry! ...is attempting to land a plane,
loaded with people, flowers and an incapacitated flight crew. Flowers?! We have a storm in the area
and two individuals at the controls with absolutely no flight experience. Just a minute. There's a bee
on that plane. I'm quite familiar with Mr. Benson and his no-account compadres. They've done
enough damage. But isn't he your only hope? Technically, a bee shouldn't be able to fly at all. Their
wings are too small... Haven't we heard this a million times? "The surface area of the wings and
body mass make no sense." - Get this on the air! - Got it. - Stand by. - We're going live. The way we
work may be a mystery to you. Making honey takes a lot of bees doing a lot of small jobs. But let
me tell you about a small job. If you do it well, it makes a big difference. More than we realized. To
us, to everyone. That's why I want to get bees back to working together. That's the bee way! We're
not made of Jell-O. We get behind a fellow. - Black and yellow! - Hello! Left, right, down, hover. -
Hover? - Forget hover. This isn't so hard. Beep-beep! Beep-beep! Barry, what happened?! Wait, I
think we were on autopilot the whole time. - That may have been helping me. - And now we're not!
So it turns out I cannot fly a plane. All of you, let's get behind this fellow! Move it out! Move out! Our
only chance is if I do what I'd do, you copy me with the wings of the plane! Don't have to yell. I'm
not yelling! We're in a lot of trouble. It's very hard to concentrate with that panicky tone in your
voice! It's not a tone. I'm panicking! I can't do this! Vanessa, pull yourself together. You have to
snap out of it! You snap out of it. You snap out of it. - You snap out of it! - You snap out of it! - You
snap out of it! - You snap out of it! - You snap out of it! - You snap out of it! - Hold it! - Why? Oome
on, it's my turn. How is the plane flying? I don't know. Hello? Benson, got any flowers for a happy
occasion in there? The Pollen Jocks! They do get behind a fellow. - Black and yellow. - Hello. All
right, let's drop this tin can on the blacktop. Where? I can't see anything. Oan you? No, nothing. It's
all cloudy. Oome on. You got to think bee, Barry. - Thinking bee. - Thinking bee. Thinking bee!
Thinking bee! Thinking bee! Wait a minute. I think I'm feeling something. - What? - I don't know. It's
strong, pulling me. Like a 27-million-year-old instinct. Bring the nose down. Thinking bee! Thinking
bee! Thinking bee! - What in the world is on the tarmac? - Get some lights on that! Thinking bee!
Thinking bee! Thinking bee! - Vanessa, aim for the flower. - OK. Out the engines. We're going in on
bee power. Ready, boys? Affirmative! Good. Good. Easy, now. That's it. Land on that flower!
Ready? Full reverse! Spin it around! - Not that flower! The other one! - Which one? - That flower. -
I'm aiming at the flower! That's a fat guy in a flowered shirt. I mean the giant pulsating flower made
of millions of bees! Pull forward. Nose down. Tail up. Rotate around it. - This is insane, Barry! -
This's the only way I know how to fly. Am I koo-koo-kachoo, or is this plane flying in an insect-like
pattern? Get your nose in there. Don't be afraid. Smell it. Full reverse! Just drop it. Be a part of it.
Aim for the center! Now drop it in! Drop it in, woman! Oome on, already. Barry, we did it! You taught
me how to fly! - Yes. No high-five! - Right. Barry, it worked! Did you see the giant flower? What giant
flower? Where? Of course I saw the flower! That was genius! - Thank you. - But we're not done yet.
Listen, everyone! This runway is covered with the last pollen from the last flowers available
anywhere on Earth. That means this is our last chance. We're the only ones who make honey,
pollinate flowers and dress like this. If we're gonna survive as a species, this is our moment! What
do you say? Are we going to be bees, orjust Museum of Natural History keychains? We're bees!
Keychain! Then follow me! Except Keychain. Hold on, Barry. Here. You've earned this. Yeah! I'm a
Pollen Jock! And it's a perfect fit. All I gotta do are the sleeves. Oh, yeah. That's our Barry. Mom!
The bees are back! If anybody needs to make a call, now's the time. I got a feeling we'll be working
late tonight! Here's your change. Have a great afternoon! Oan I help who's next? Would you like
some honey with that? It is bee-approved. Don't forget these. Milk, cream, cheese, it's all me. And I
don't see a nickel! Sometimes I just feel like a piece of meat! I had no idea. Barry, I'm sorry. Have
you got a moment? Would you excuse me? My mosquito associate will help you. Sorry I'm late.
He's a lawyer too? I was already a blood-sucking parasite. All I needed was a briefcase. Have a
great afternoon! Barry, I just got this huge tulip order, and I can't get them anywhere. No problem,
Vannie. Just leave it to me. You're a lifesaver, Barry. Oan I help who's next? All right, scramble,
jocks! It's time to fly. Thank you, Barry! That bee is living my life! Let it go, Kenny. - When will this
nightmare end?! - Let it all go. - Beautiful day to fly. - Sure is. Between you and me, I was dying to
get out of that office. You have got to start thinking bee, my friend. - Thinking bee! - Me? Hold it.
Let's just stop for a second. Hold it. I'm sorry. I'm sorry, everyone. Oan we stop here? I'm not
making a major life decision during a production number! All right. Take ten, everybody. Wrap it up,
guys. I had virtually no rehearsal for that.

Someone posted the whole Bee Movie script

Corlien

The Republic of Comunisza

Sharknov wrote:unnecesarilly long quote that i wont include

holy yappito

The Republic of HOLY COW AN ANARCHY

Did you ever hear the tragedy of Darth Plagueis the Wise? I thought not. It’s not a story the Jedi would tell you. It’s a Sith legend. Darth Plagueis was a dark lord of the Sith, so powerful and so wise he could use the Force to influence the midichlorians to create life… He had such a knowledge of the Dark Side that he could even keep the ones he cared about from dying. The Dark Side of the Force is a pathway to many abilities some would consider to be unnatural. He became so powerful… the only thing he was afraid of was losing his own power, which eventually, of course, he did. Unfortunately, he taught his apprentice everything he knew. Then his apprentice killed him in his sleep. Ironic. He could save others from death, but not himself.

The Republic of HOLY COW AN ANARCHY

[♪♪♪]
[EXCLAIMS HAPPILY]
[SLURPS]
[WORM YELLS]
Mm. Those are good worms right there.
Hey, Alex! How’s the commute treating you?
Hey, I can’t complain.
That never stopped him before.
Right?
[BOTH LAUGH]
Well, we made good time today.
[BOTH GRUNT]
Red was one of my students.
Hmm?
Not sure about the dabbing though.
Mom! Mom, did you get my picture?
Well, this is our stop.
ALL: ♪ The birds in the sky Go through the air ♪
♪ All the way there ♪
Today, we’re gonna learn about how Red saved the eggs.
[ALL CHEER]
I love Red!
I gotta go to the bathroom!
Why didn’t you go in the slingshot?
Huh?
Bomb, anything from Piggy Island?
Nope.
Chuck. Anything to the north?
[GASPS]
Nope. Nothing.
What’s that?
Uh-oh.
CHUCK: Incoming pie!
It’s coming straight for us.
What do we do?
Duck!
[YELLS]
What?
Ah!
I got pie all over my face!
Hey, sorry, buddy.
[GROANS]
[CHEERING]
What, what? Yeah!
Those pigs…
Are gonna pay…
For our lunches!
Uh… Because of our hunger to give them…
A taste of their own…
Quesadillas!
What?
[BABY GASPS]
It’s Red.
I’m sorry, guys.
We’re taking over the Blue Line. Official business.
Oh, yeah!
Of course, anything for you.
BIRD: Hey, Red!
Isn’t it funny how nobody liked you until you saved Bird Island? But now we all love you.
Ha. Thanks so much for bringing that up.
Okay, ready?
Three…
Two…
Two!
Bomb, you say “one.”
Oh, right.
BOMB: One!
[♪♪♪]
[CHOIR VOCALIZING]
Yoo-hoo. Hot sauce, please.
[BOTH LAUGH]
Yeah! Got him.
Thank you.
CROWD [CHANTING]: Red! Red!
I really want the red one. The red one.
Ha, ha! Balloonie!
Heh, heh. That’s it. A little bit higher.
Ha, ha!
[CRYING]
[CRYING]
[KIDS SCREAM]
[GRUNTS]
[GRUNTS]
[GRUNTS]
[CRYING]
But I was bouncing!
You mess with the hatchlings, you get the cannonball.
Ready, big guy?
Oh, yeah. You ready, bigger guy?
[GROWLS]
[GRUNTS]
BIRD: Cannonball! Cannonball!
♪ I need a hero ♪
Why won’t you just take a bath?
Why won’t you just take a bath?
[BABBLING]
Huh?
[ALL SCREAM]
[LEONARD LAUGHS]
This might pinch a little.
[GASPS]
[SCREAMING]
Ah! I can’t see!
Catch you later.
[LAUGHS] You stupid birds.
No! Please, don’t!
Aah!
[LAUGHS]
Not on my watch.
Sorry, guys.
RED: Excuse me, sir, but I believe this belongs to you.
My hero.
Don’t. Stop.
[CHUCKLES] I said, “Don’t stop.”
[BIRDS YELLING]
[LEONARD LAUGHING]
Leonard?
Got him!
Hey, Leonard, you should probably…
[GRUNTS]
Huh?
That’s not coming from Bird Island.
[GASPS]
LEONARD: What the heck is that?
And where did it come from?
[♪♪♪]
We’re gonna need a bigger slingshot.
[♪♪♪]
Another successful day of protecting the island.
Great job, guys.
Oh, yeah.
Woo-hoo! Woo!
ALL: You saved us, Red.
You’re our hero.
Heh, what can I say? That’s what I do.
Now, why don’t you just go run along and keep your big, cute eyes peeled for the next pig prank, all right?
[IN GRAVELLY VOICE] Pigs.
KIDS: We’re going to get you!
Oink, oink, oink.
[ALL GIGGLING]
[CHUCKLES] Adorable.
Let’s finish cleaning up these crabs, then we can move on to…
Done and done.
[GRUNTS]
Red, what is it?
What the heck?
BOMB: Is it a per…? Is it a head?
What is that?
Oh, look. It seems like it’s some kind of note.
What if it’s a love note?
A message in a bottle?
Or a genie in a bottle.
Guys, there’s no bottle, so just, you know, stop.
[LEONARD READS ON-SCREEN TEXT]
[CHUCKLES] Nice try, piggies.
News flash: We’re not idiots.
Hey.
[LEONARD READS ON-SCREEN TEXT]
Uh…
[BIRDS MURMURING]
[GRUNTING] I got it!
Oh, no!
Check it out, everybody.
Let me see that.
A truce! A truce!
A truce with the pigs!
A truce?
The prank war is over!
[BOTH LAUGHING]
What?
No, this is just another one of their pranks.
What?
Huh?
This is a huge relief, right?
Who else was getting tired of the pranking and retaliation?
Me! This guy!
Tired? No, no, no. Guys, listen.
Imagine all the fun things we can do now.
I can think of one.
You think he’ll go?
I think we’ve piqued his interest.
No, no, no. Guys, we are working tirelessly, day and night, to save the world.
But the world doesn’t need saving.
Of course they need us.
CHUCK: Red.
Huh?
Come here, hon.
What are you so afraid of?
Afraid of? I…
What do I have to be afraid of?
♪ All by myself ♪
♪ Don’t wanna be ♪
♪ All by myself ♪
♪ Anymore ♪
I’m not afraid of anything.
CHUCK: You know what?
I’ll write you a prescription for fun with your cool friends.
Especially Chuck.
Come on. Come with us.
What are you talking…? Come to what?
We can’t tell you because you wouldn’t be into it.
[EXCLAIMS HAPPILY]
[EXCLAIMS HAPPILY]
Oh. Oh, oh, oh, oh.
[LAUGHS]
[CHUCK & BOMB LAUGH]
KIDS: Oink, oink, oink! Oink, oink, oink!
Ha! Now we have all your eggs.
And there’s nothing you can do about it, Red.
BOTH: Oink, oink, oink.
[GROWLS] Laugh it up, piggies, because you’re gonna be crying in a second when I kick your butts and take those rocks back.
Eggs.
What?
You said “rocks” instead of “eggs” again.
Oh, sorry.
I don’t know why I keep doing that.
Because they are rocks.
[SNIFFLES]
Don’t cry, Sam-Sam.
I’ll be right back.
Hey, Daddy.
[GROWLS]
[GRUNTS]
Just borrowing my sisters for a minute.
[GROWLS]
Ha. Now we really have all your eggs.
Yeah, and there’s nothing you can do about it, Red.
BOTH: Oink, oink, oink, oink, oink.
Laugh it up, piggies, because you’re gonna be crying in a second when I kick your butts and take all your…
Uh… uh…
Uh, uh. Um, um, um, um.
Oh, crap.
[HUMMING]
Okay, we’ll just…
[YELLS]
What is this thing that almost killed me? Frozen water?
Who’s ever heard of frozen water?
Courtney? Courtney, bring me those images.
What, what, what? Oh, okay, I’m coming. I’m coming.
Give me that.
Oh, that looks cold.
Three umbrellas in one drink?
What kind of extravagant lunatic are we dealing with?
[♪♪♪]
Mm.
[SIGHS]
♪ Nibblin’ on sponge cake ♪
[GROANS]
♪ Watchin’ the sun bake ♪
ZETA: There goes my toothpaste.
I am tired of this.
Woo. Yes! Hot shower.
♪ Strummin’ my six string ♪
There we go.
[SCREAMS]
DEBBIE [CHANTING]: Go, Zeta. You killing it.
Go, Zeta. You killing it.
Woo! Zeta!
Come on, baby. Go get it.
Let’s go get it.
Go get the stick.
[GROANS]
Ha, ha!
[BARKING]
[GROWLS] Whoa! Whoa, whoa.
Oh, my gosh!
[SIGHS]
I can’t do this anymore.
Okay, Debbie?
Okay.
I’m done. I’m done living on this frozen, seal-infested iceberg of an island.
Fire another ice ball!
Uh… We can’t do that, Zeta.
Wait…
You’re torturing the engineer.
Um, uh, Hello?!
My limbs are beginning to numb.
[LAUGHS] Oh, yeah, I forgot about that.
You better tell him to improve his aim.
It’s about time we start living that good life.
Good life, here we come.
I deserve to feel the hot sand squishing between my beautiful talons.
DEBBIE: You deserve that and more.
ZETA: Yes, I do!
[LAUGHS]
[CHUCK & BOMB YELL]
[GRUNTS]
Ha, ha!
Well, here we are.
Are you ready, Red? Love awaits!
Speed dating? No. No way.
It’s mating season.
All right, lovebirds. You all know how this works.
When you hear this sound…
[TWEETS]
…then it’s time to move on to the next table, where your soul mate just might be waiting.
Yeah, I’m going home.
Absolutely not. You have nothing else to do.
I hid your keys on some part of my body, and I’m not telling you where unless you stay. Ha, ha!
Yeah, let’s party!
Hey, yo! Chuck’s the name.
Speed’s the game. Like games?
Well…
You entered the love lottery, and guess what?
[SING-SONGY] You won! Because here I am.
Hi.
Hi.
[LAUGHS]
I eat dirt.
[LAUGHS]
Oh. Ew.
[BIRD TWEETS]
Hey, y’all!
Who’s ready to party?
[LAUGHS] Not me.
No, I’m actually not here for the whole speed-dating horror-show thing going on.
Uh-uh. Shh.
This mating dance is for you.
♪ Y’all ready for this? ♪
[♪♪♪]
[TWEETS]
I’d love to hear about you.
What’s your favorite sign?
This one’s mine.
[LAUGHS]
You know, the flavor can vary greatly, depending on the minerals in the dirt.
I can tell which kind of worms have crawled through there.
Or what sort of roly-polies used it to raise their family in.
Um. Are you mad?
No.
I don’t know. You look mad.
Well, I’m not.
You know what? Maybe it’s your eyebrows.
My eyebrows are fine. That’s the way I look.
It’s like you’ve got resting bird face.
Oh, yeah? Well, you know, that’s not a thing.
[BIRD TWEETS]
[LAUGHING]
BIRD: Yes! Amazing.
BOMB: I’m not a total animal.
But I do enjoy eating dirt.
[SIGHS]
Okay, worms, birdseed or just garbage from a dumpster?
I’m sorry, what?
Favorite food, silly. Don’t think.
Just answer from your gut. Go!
Um. Uh, toast?
Okay. Toast.
Favorite color?
Uh.
Stupid question. Red, duh.
If you could have one superpower, what would it be?
Um, to disappear, like, right now.
Okay. What do you do in your free time?
Yeah, I mean, I don’t really have any free time.
I kinda protect Bird Island from being attacked, and that’s a full-time gig, so yeah.
I thought I heard something about a truce.
Ha, ha! No. A truce, no. That’s not gonna last.
You’ll have a lot more free time now that nobody needs you anymore, so…
Okay. We are done here.
Are you afraid to talk about your feelings?
You know, just because I don’t want to talk about them doesn’t mean I’m afraid.
Okay. So avoids personal questions.
Unusually angry.
Talks to herself.
Self-esteem issues.
Doesn’t answer own questions.
Left-handed. Probably a witch.
Looks like we’re definitely incompatible.
Oh, and you needed a form to tell you that. Okay.
Hope you have luck annoying the next guy.
I don’t need luck. I have a formula.
Okay. Have a nice life.
Have fun being alone.
Oh, I will.
Aw.
There he goes, like a ship in the night.
No rudder, no purpose, no crew.
Well, have a good night.
[♪♪♪]
[SIGHS]
♪ In the arms of an angel ♪
♪ Fly away from here ♪
♪ From this dark cold Hotel room ♪
♪ And the endlessness… ♪
Loser!
Loser!
[KNOCKING ON DOOR]
[GROANS]
[BURPS]
[GRUNTING]
♪ In the arms… ♪
[SONG DISTORTS, STOPS]
[♪♪♪]
Hello! Oh.
[SCREAMS]
Look, Red, I know we’ve had our differences.
Oh, like when you tried to eat our young?
I come in peace.
Ouch.
Aah!
Look, I don’t want to see your face any more than you want to see mine.
We’re all in danger!
Yeah. From you.
Ouch!
No, we have a truce.
Didn’t you get my note? It was on a balloon.
Oh, yeah, that’s right.
You wanted to talk.
This is not how a truce works.
Just say what you gotta say and then get out.
[SQUEALS]
Red, we’ve discovered that there’s a third island, and they’re plotting to destroy us all.
A third island?
[BUZZER BEEPING]
Give me one reason why I should believe you.
Haven’t you noticed any strange objects falling from the sky?
Giant balls of ice?
♪ But you’ll look sweet ♪
♪ Upon the seat ♪
♪ Of my… ♪
♪ Bicycle built for two ♪
Nope, nothing. Haven’t seen anything.
Well, I have, and I’ll show you the proof.
Squeal Team Six!
What the…?
Hey, hey, hey. Easy, easy. Stop.
Everybody stop.
Aah!
[GRUNTING]
[TOILET FLUSHES]
[STOMACH RUMBLES]
Aah!
That image in your hand is Eagle Island, and those are eagles.
Eagles? How did you get these?
From a drone.
And do you spy on us with that?
Yes.
So have you seen me…?
Yes, and it’s disgusting.
Red, this is bigger than pranks.
We need to put aside our differences and work together.
To save our whole world from being destroyed.
CROWD [CHANTING]: Red! Red! Red!
Red! Red! Red! Red! Red! Red!
What we really need is a hero.
I’m in.
Wonderful!
We’ll have to get a team together.
RED: Yes, we will.
But, hey, I’m in charge.
Actually, that position’s been filled.
Boo-yah!
Uh.
Yeah. By me.
Oh, man, you’re gonna love this guy.
Not the smartest bird in the tree, but what he lacks in smarts, he makes up for in firepower.
Achoo!
Happy birthday!
Aah!
BIRD: We’ve got a number two at the Porta Potty.
[BOMB SCREAMS]
[SIRENS WAIL]
All right, I’m going!
We’re busting you out.
Uh… how?
[POPS]
Aah!
Like that.
Oh, I love it.
MOMB: Bomb, what was that noise?
You’re still grounded!
I’m an adult, Mom!
Run.
MOMB: Bomb, get back here!
Aah!
This guy is so fast, he can beat time itself in a footrace.
Hey, Chuck, we’re putting together a team.
And I think we’re on it!
[RINGS]
[SNORES, THEN GASPS]
[MOOS IN SLOW MOTION]
Come on, everybody. Let’s work those booties!
[HUMMING]
I’m in.
Ha, ha, great!
But how did you…?
BT-dubs, you misspelled “heist.”
It’s “E-I,” I corrected it.
Don’t worry. It’s a common misperception.
Well, thank you.
[LAUGHS]
You’re right. He’s fast.
[LAUGHS]
RED: Now, this guy is kind of a ding-dong, but he’s the only eagle we know.
Well, you’ve come to the right eagle. Tell me more.
It’s a really exciting mission to a place called Eagle…
Eagle Island?
Yes.
So you’ve heard…
[YELLING]
CHUCK: Heard of it.
Nice to meet you!
Okay, so now we just need to figure out how this volcanic super-weapon works, huh?
We’re gonna need some kind of engineering wizard, brainiac.
Hm.
Hm.
Oh!
[VOCALIZING]
Yes, Chuck. You obviously have something you want to say or sing.
I have got just the guy. It’s a girl.
My sister Silver.
She goes to Avian Academy, top of her class.
She would be perfect.
Yeah, she totally would.
BIRD 1: See you at the dorm!
BIRD 2: Yeah, see you, Ella.
BIRD 3: Hey, good catch!
I mean, we all just thought she was weird, you know?
She skipped four grades, won an Engineer of the Year Award, and got a scholarship at Avian Academy.
Perfect. That is exactly what we’re looking for.
You are absolutely gonna love her.
But don’t love her too much. That’s my sister, Red.
[IN DEEP VOICE] Or I’ll crush every bone in your body!
[NORMALLY] Oh. Frisbee!
Hi, I’m Chuck. Know where the Engineering department is?
SILVER: With a combination of over 30 silk, wire and cotton-based threads spun together, I now present to you…
Super String!
[SNORING]
[CLEARS THROAT] I said, “It’s Super String!”
More like “Stupid String.”
I know what you’re thinking, Mike.
You’re like, “What’s so super about it?”
Great question, Mike.
Well, how about that it’s very easily able to withstand the pull of 18,000 more kilos than any other string known to…
[BELL RINGS]
BIRD: Snooze alert.
Known to bird-kind!
Or pig-kind, for that matter.
[♪♪♪]
[SIGHS]
What’s up, sis?
Chuck?
BOTH: I’m so happy to… It’s really…
Great to… Jinx, jinx.
Jinx!
Jinx. One, two, three. I win!
You can’t speak until someone says your name.
Hello? You in here?
Hello?
You?
You?
You.
Wait. You know this guy?
[MUFFLEDLY] I would answer, but you jinxed me.
Oh, okay, Chuck, I unjinx you.
This is one of my best buddies, Red. These are the guys.
Hi.
We’re the guys.
Guys, this is Silver, the greatest kid sister in the world.
I’m not exactly a kid anymore, Chuck.
Oh, you’ll always be my kid sister!
Okay. Hey, everyone.
You know, I don’t think this is gonna work.
It’s just that I’m not sure you’re gonna be compatible with the team.
Oh, wow, it is such a pleasure to meet not you, but you!
I’ve never met a pig before.
Your technological achievements are amazing.
May I shake your hoof?
Why, thank you.
I like her.
And this has to be Bomb.
Whoa!
How’d you know that?
You have a fuse coming out of your head.
Oh, so cool!
[IMITATES FUSE BURNING, EXPLOSION]
[CLEARS THROAT]
LEONARD: Backflip.
So I, um… I hear you’re some kind of engineering wizard or whatever.
Oh, ha. I mean, I don’t like to brag, but…
Wait. Who’s that?
And why is she all over these achievement awards?
[♪♪♪]
The kid’s amazing, right?
Not a kid anymore, Chuck.
Toot toot! Tickle Train arriving at Sister Station!
Chuck, no.
I am a serious academic.
[LAUGHING] I am a serious…
[LAUGHS]
CHUCK: Stop!
Oh, look how cute this is.
♪ We’re sailing in the ocean We must ♪
ALL: ♪ Row! Row! ♪
♪ The eggs are in our sights And we must ♪
ALL: ♪ Go! Go! ♪
♪ We’ll get them back Before our parents ♪
ALL: ♪ Know! Know! ♪
♪ And save the day like Red The real ♪
ALL: ♪ Hero! Row! ♪
BOTH [LAUGHING]: Gotcha!
Woo-hoo! We did it.
That was so easy!
Yeah!
A little too easy, actually.
What do you mean by that?
Well, normally, when things are this easy, some dramatically unexpected setback occurs.
I don’t get it.
Me neither.
Well, it’s kind of hard to explain.
But it’s sort of like, you know how some…?
Oh, see? Like that.
Are you freaking kidding me?
[♪♪♪]
LEONARD: Each of you has been selected because you’re the best in your field.
ALL: Oh.
LEONARD: That we could find.
ALL: Oh.
Your skills will be put to the test facing this.
As you can clearly see, this is a vol…
Volcano.
“A volcano” is what my assistant was going to say.
You’re the assistant!
Let go. Let go.
No, I’m the leader.
I’ll take that.
[CLEARS THROAT] Actually, it’s a composite volcano.
You can tell by the height and the apparent vent clusters.
Okay, forget I said “volcano.”
This is a… It’s a super-weapon!
[ALL GASP]
Weird, because it looks just like a volcano.
Yep, and here’s the scary part.
This is their psychotic leader!
[ALL GASP]
Ooh! How’d that get in there? Ha, ha. Next.
Oh, butt shot.
Next. No. Next. Next!
BOMB: I don’t even know what I’m looking at.
Courtney!
I mean, you took them.
[CLEARS THROAT]
This is their psychotic leader.
[WHINING]
[YELLS]
Whoa, whoa, whoa. Hey. Buddy, do you know her?
What? Me? No.
No, definitely not, absolutely not.
Never seen her before in my life.
Who is that? I don’t know!
Not terribly convincing, but moving on.
Great. What’s the plan?
All right, here’s what we’re looking at, folks.
Step one: Travel undetected to Eagle Island.
Hmm.
Uh-huh.
Step two: We’re gonna break into the super-weapon.
Got it.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
And step three: Ooh, ooh.
Deactivate the superweapon.
Once we break in there…
SILVER [WHISPERS]: No plan… hopefully, before both islands are destroyed and we all die, so that’s, uh… That’s it.
Right. So I just have a few questions.
Why? I explained everything.
It’s a foolproof plan.
Yeah. How do we sneak onto the island?
What is the super-weapon and how do we deactivate it?
And when you say “escape,” how do you plan to do that?
This is a crucial thing to figure out.
I agree. Why isn’t she in charge?
Told you she’s super smart.
Hey, guys, hold on a second, please.
Mighty Eagle?
What? What are you looking at?
Do you have an Eagle Island map?
What? No. No, there’s no map.
Oh, it’s a map.
RED: Yeah, that’s a map.
Mm-hm. Okay, I just wanna read it.
Wait a minute. Do you guys hear that?
Do we hear what?
Sounds like a, um, like a whistle.
It almost sounds like a:
[IMITATING WHISTLE]
[GASPS] Hey, guys?
[ALL GASP]
RED: Run!
[ALL YELLING]
Emergency exit, all the way down!
[YELLS AND GASPS]
Well, that’s not safe.
CHUCK: Wait! Stop!
LEONARD: Holy macaroni!
RED: Oh, boy.
Everyone hop on!
[ALL YELLING]
[♪♪♪]
ZETA: Rewind it. Rewind it. Play it again.
Play it again. Play it again.
Ha, ha. Yes, baby! We knocked the top right off of that!
Glenn, you didn’t mess it up this time.
Boom! Up top. Or not.
Nailed it!
Jerry, up top.
That should send him running.
Wait. “Him”?
Who you sending running?
Yeah. Who’s “him”?
“Them.” I said “them.” Stop asking me stupid questions.
I’m so sorry.
Wow.
That was crazy.
We could have died.
Thanks for saving our lives, Mighty Eagle!
Well, you can always count on…
[ALL YELLING AND GRUNTING]
RED: Everyone grab the map!
Hey, it’s working.
RED: Left! Left! Lean to the left!
[SIGHS]
[MAP RIPS]
Please tell me that was your pants ripping.
I don’t wear pants!
ALL: None of us wear pants!
[♪♪♪]
Uh-oh.
[ALL YELLING]
Eight point one seconds.
CHUCK: Silver! No!
[GRUNTING]
[ALL GRUNT]
[GASPS]
Oh.
Uh…
Heh, heh.
CHUCK: Hey!
What is this?
Oh, well, I mean, she was, you know, just thanking me for saving everyone, so…
I’m sorry. Saving everyone?
Yeah.
RED: You know, the map was my idea.
It ripped.
Maybe because there’s too many birds.
I…
[YELLS AND GASPS]
My mountain!
We are in trouble.
BOTH: We gotta stop that super-weapon.
Jinx!
[GROANS]
BIRD 1: Oh, this is bad. This is really bad.
BIRD 2: Eagle Mountain?
[GASPS]
Are we gonna be okay?
Oh, my gah…
What happened to Eagle Mountain, Mom?
Wait a minute. Wait. Wait. Wait.
Why isn’t anybody leaving? Why they not scared?
Okay. Oh, okay, okay.
Here’s what we gonna do.
I want y’all to take all of those ice balls and fill them up with… Ha, ha…
Molten lava.
That’s not possible.
What? You never heard of thermal emulsifiers?
Well, yes, yes.
You just got to get a polyacrylamide to enhance the nanoparticle and surfactant association between the two materials.
Uh. Okay.
So you do that, and I’m gonna go feed my baby.
Yes, I’m finally gonna feed my baby.
There you go. Who’s my baby?
You’re my baby.
[SMOOCHES]
[SEAL BARKS]
What…? Don’t…
You better not wink at me. Don’t you wink at me.
[GROWLS]
BIRD 1: Who could have done this?
BIRD 2: I can’t believe it.
BIRD 3: Are we gonna be okay?
BIRD 4: What are we gonna do?
All right, guys, do not worry.
We got this.
Red here has got your back.
And your front and your sides.
And my floof?
Yeah, even your cute little floof.
Looks like you’re gonna be okay.
So are you 100 percent sure we shouldn’t evacuate?
No, Red’s gonna take care of us. Right, Red?
Yes! Everybody, please, just stay calm.
Great news! Thank you!
We’re gonna be okay. Red’s here.
BIRD 1: We love you, Red!
BIRD 2: We need you!
Oh, thank you.
Your support means the world to me.
Okay, Leonard, so where’s our ride?
[SQUEAKS]
Aw.
It’s so cute.
Wow. Okay. And how are we all supposed to fit in…?
Oh, I think we’ll manage.
Boop.
[BOAT BEEPS]
[♪♪♪]
Whoa, okay.
Whoa.
Oh, my gah…
All aboard!
[BIRD WHISTLES]
BOMB: Whoa.
Anyone want to grab their own bag or anything?
Don’t screw this up, Red!
If we die, it’s kind of your fault.
[INHALES AND EXHALES DEEPLY] I got this.
[♪♪♪]
[CHUCK SINGING OPERATICALLY]
[SINGING OPERATICALLY]
[SINGING OPERATICALLY]
[SIGHS] Wow.
[LEONARD IMITATES HORN]
[GASPS] Ow!
Ladies and gentlemen, I’d like to introduce you to our master of gadgetry:
Garry!
Garry!
[CHEERS]
This is it?
This is the amazing team I’ve been working around the clock for?
Ha, ha. Working with what we got.
[SLURPS]
Well, that’s disappointing.
Wow. Okay.
This is the part where you get up and follow me!
Welcome to my piggy gadget lab.
Oh, yeah.
GARRY: Everywhere you look, you’ll see inventions being tested by my team of guinea pigs.
SILVER: Oh. This is so cool.
BOMB: I know. Right?
GARRY: All the gadgets have been designed specifically with your current mission in mind.
The first being Invisa-Spray.
Need to go undetected in plain sight?
Invisa-Spray does exactly that.
Wow, I’m invisible!
ALL: Whoa.
“Whoa,” indeed.
That’s amazing.
How long does the invisibility last for?
Forever.
Wait. What?
[RINGS]
Tina, we’re not gonna be able to see each other tonight.
And what does the next gadget do? Bury us alive?
What? That would be ridiculous.
[WHISPERS, IN PIG LATIN] Ix-nay the shovel-ay.
[IN ENGLISH] And moving right along.
[CHUCK & BOMB LAUGHING]
What are you guys doing?
This is so fun!
Oh, it’s so squishy.
What is this stuff?
Oh, well, that is a special type of flame retardant we call pig snot.
Why do you call it…? You know what? Never mind.
Ugh.
[GRIMACING]
[ALL GROAN]
Yeah! Lick it.
Now, everyone, prepare yourselves ’cause this next one is really something special.
Whoa. So shiny.
Yes, my friend. Bold yet sleek. Simple while complex.
This device can detect an eagle anywhere within a 100-foot radius.
[♪♪♪]
Well, how does it work?
Simply push this button, and it does the rest.
Whoa.
Whoa.
Whoa.
Whoa.
There’s an eagle nearby.
There’s an eagle nearby. There’s an eagle nearby.
[GROANS]
There’s an eagle nearby.
There’s an eagle nearby.
Why, yes. Clearly, there is.
Okay, you got me, guys.
There’s an eagle nearby.
This clever thing will…
There’s an eagle nearby.
…no doubt prove to be…
There’s an eagle nearby.
…crucial during your mission.
There’s an eagle nearby.
Wonderful. That’s amazing!
There’s an eagle nearby.
Can you turn it off?
There’s an eagle nearby.
It’ll turn itself off.
There’s an eagle nearby.
[SIGHS] Oh, thank goodness.
One hour after it doesn’t detect any more eagles.
What?
There’s an eagle nearby.
There’s an eagle nearby.
Hey! Hey!
There’s an eagle near… There.
Oh, thank you.
Okay, guys, these gadgets are terri…
Hey, hey, Red, can we chat for a sec?
I can tell you’re used to running the show.
That’s great and all. But maybe since we’re all a team here, a team you put together, maybe you can try to be more supportive.
The results might surprise you, huh?
Fine. Fine, fine, fine.
Garry. Woo. Unbelievable. Really, really good stuff.
You know what? I’m sure I can figure out a plan to…
You know, to use all this…
This awesomeness that you’ve… Bomb!
Hi, Red.
[SIGHS] How are we ever gonna get up there?
[CRYING] I want my unborn sisters back.
It’s just, the eggs are up there, and we’re down here.
Oh, how are we ever gonna get up there?
Oh.
[GRUNTS]
You’re doing great, Zoe.
Now hold it tight, okay?
[BOTH GASP]
[BOTH GRUNT]
BOTH: Uh-oh.
Quick, let some air out!
[GRUNTS AND GASPS]
It won’t untie!
Okay, let me try. Aah!
What’s…? What’s the prob…?
Prob… Prob…
Problem?
[BOTH CRYING]
♪ Ground control to Major Tom ♪
♪ Ground control to Major Tom ♪
♪ Take your protein pills And put your… ♪
[AIR WHISTLING]
[ALL YELLING]
Don’t worry, guys. I’ll get us out of this.
[♪♪♪]
ALL: The eggs!
[ALL LAUGHING]
We got you for reals now. Mwah!
See? I told you I would get us out of this.
[ALL GRUNT]
[ALL GASP]
[SNORING]
[SOFTLY] A boa constructor.
[LAUGHING]
It is glorious! I’m a genius!
[GIGGLES]
Yes, I love it! This was my idea.
Wait. Wait.
BIRD 1: Look out!
BIRD 2: Aah! I’m burning!
BIRD 1: I told you to look out.
Glenn, I wanted lava balls, not lava puddles.
Uh-oh. Glenn’s messing up.
I mean, we… We’re very close. We just need two more weeks.
Two weeks? Two weeks.
Huh.
Um. It’s quite the undertaking.
Okay, okay, you know what? I’m doing that thing again.
That thing, you know, like, where I’m not quite sure I heard what I think I heard.
Hey, skinny, sassy face!
Did you hear “two weeks,” or did you hear “tomorrow”?
Um. Uh, I heard “tomorrow”?
Fat dude, what did you hear?
Uh. Definitely what you said?
Okay, you know what I’m gonna do?
I am gonna call my old engineer, Steve.
And you know what? You’re a lot like him.
[BUZZING]
STEVE [ON VOICEMAIL]: Hey, it’s Steve!
Sorry I can’t come to the phone right now…
[MUFFLED GRUNTS]
…but you know what to do.
Oh, yeah. I had to discipline Steve.
So, what was that that you had said to me?
Tomorrow.
That’s what I thought you said. See, everybody happy now.
[BOTH LAUGH AWKWARDLY]
[GROANS]
[SONAR BEEPING]
♪ Turn down for what ♪
♪ Turn down for what ♪
♪ Turn down for what ♪
♪ Turn down for what ♪
[GASPS]
[GRUNTS]
[BOTH LAUGHING]
[BOTH GASP AND GRUNT]
RED: No. No, no, no.
[LAUGHS] Uh-oh. Whoa. Whoa.
CHUCK: Careful, buddy. That’s not…
[YELLS AND GRUNTS]
Whoa.
[♪♪♪]
Okay, guys, let’s do this.
Here we go.
We got this.
We got an island to save, kids.
Two islands. We have two islands to save.
I can’t do this.
I’ve made a terrible mistake.
What are you talking about?
[GROANS] Zeta.
Who is Zeta?
The leader of the eagles.
The one who’s been trying to destroy our islands.
And my ex-fiancée.
Wait. What?
Did you say “fiancée”?
Beyoncé?
And you’re just telling us this now?
Better late than never. Heh-heh-heh.
MIGHTY EAGLE: It was many years ago, in the 1990s.
She was the smartest girl in school.
And I had an incredible sense of fashion.
Whoa.
[CHUCKLES] Hey.
MIGHTY EAGLE: It was love at first sight.
Woo!
Ha, ha!
[PAGER BEEPS]
[GASPS]
♪ I don’t want to wait ♪
“I miss you”? Aw.
♪ For our lives to be over ♪
BOTH: Whoa!
[BOTH LAUGHING]
MIGHTY EAGLE: She was the best thing that ever happened to me.
[YELLING]
[BOTH THUD]
MIGHTY EAGLE: But since I wasn’t quite ready to mate for life… Oh, wow. Uh… An engagement ring?
Uh…
MIGHTY EAGLE: Naturally, I…
[THUNDER RUMBLES]
MIGHTY EAGLE: I… I abandoned her.
[ALL GASP]
How could you leave like that?
Because I am a coward.
Many of you didn’t know that about me.
Well, actually…
I assume she’s been heartbroken ever since.
It’s all my fault.
So this is Beyoncé we’re talking about?
You know what? I just remembered.
I have something to do back home!
Thanks for the help.
[♪♪♪]
[SNORING]
[PUNCHES LANDING]
[♪♪♪]
Well, that got dark.
[♪♪♪]
[INDISTINCT CHATTERING OVER RADIO]
Okay, gang, listen up.
This place is crawling with security, but if you guys follow me…
[LAUGHING]
Hey, hey, hey, what’s going on?
What do you think, guys? Should we show him?
Show me what?
Harvey!
Super lifelike disguise, right?
Disguise?
We thought we’d let you drive.
And I’m gonna help you pedal.
Wait. You guys came up with this idea without me?
Yeah.
♪ All by myself ♪
♪ Don’t wanna be All by myself ♪
Yeah, well, it’s not gonna work.
We think it’s our best chance of getting past the guards.
I’m with Silver.
Me too.
Yeah, she’s smart.
Everyone is counting on me to make sure that…
Us. Everyone’s counting on us.
Fine. Whatever. So your plan is to get into the super-weapon with that?
Harvey, don’t take offense. He does not mean it.
[GROANS] Fine. Fine. You know what?
I’ll just be up here saving the world.
[GRUNTS] Just like I should have been doing this whole time.
Uh, guys? I 100 percent believe in you and this Harvey idea, but I think this one’s gonna need me.
[♪♪♪]
Well, they didn’t see us.
This isn’t an “us” thing, Silver.
I’ve got this covered. Go away.
Is this a good time to talk about feelings?
No, it’s not a good time!
[GRUNTS]
[SIGHS]
[YELPS]
No. No, I don’t need your help, okay?
I meant to slip. Leave me alone!
Your hat fell off.
RED: Yeah, I got rid of it because it was getting heavy.
[♪♪♪]
[♪♪♪]
All right, guys, beak action is a go.
Arms, what say you?
Armed and ready.
[♪♪♪]
Two fully functional armies.
Right above our leggies. Ha, ha.
LEONARD: Okay, leggies, show me what you got.
[LAUGHING]
Oh, yeah.
Woo-hoo!
We got this!
We must look amazing!
Okay, guys, we’re going live.
Come on, Jerry.
You know there’s no snacking while we’re on duty.
But I had a really small breakfast.
All right, I’ll do the talking.
[CLEARS THROAT]
[IN HIGH VOICE] Hello, fellow eagle guards.
Hm?
Hm?
Oh, no. He’s doing a voice.
I’m running late to the old job.
Commute was rough today for some reason.
But the good news is I made it!
[NORMALLY] Ninety-degree turn. Quick!
[IN HIGH VOICE] But the good news is I made it.
ID, please.
Oh. Uh… ID?
Uh. Not sure I have it on me.
[WHISPERS NORMALLY] Act like you’re checking pockets.
[GRUNTS] It’s stuck!
LEONARD: Stuck?
Ow! What the heck are you doing?!
EAGLE [OVER RADIO]: Be on alert for an intruder.
Wait a minute.
What’s happening?
Shh. He’s on to us.
[SNIFFS] Hmm.
We are so dead.
All right. I know what’s going on here.
I’m picking up what you’re putting down.
Jerry, you getting a load of this?
Yeah, I think I am.
[GROANS]
Yeah, Jerry, I know exactly what’s going on.
[GROANS]
This right here…
[GROANS]
is obviously… a new guy!
Yeah, impostors in a costume.
Wait. What?
Oh.
Uh.
Huh?
Huh?
Yeah! You’re the new guard for the east tower.
[IN HIGH VOICE] Yes.
Yes, I am.
[LAUGHS] I knew it.
Jerry, swipe the new guy in.
Okay.
Thank you so much.
[NORMALLY] Okay, guys, we’re in.
Oh, yeah.
ALL: Woo! Woo-hoo!
COURTNEY: We did it.
BOMB: Work it. Work it.
COURTNEY: Okay.
LEONARD: Wiggle the butt.
CHUCK: Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah.
LEONARD: Huh?
[♪♪♪]
♪ I’m on fire ♪
LEONARD: Come on, come on. Let’s go. Let’s go!
♪ Baby, baby, baby Baby, baby, baby ♪
[♪♪♪]
[RED GRUNTING]
Get to the top of the super-weapon. Check!
[SIGHS]
Yay!
You did it.
Okay, so how’s it looking down there?
Ooh, ooh, ooh. Do you see that?
[GASPS] Oh, it’s the super-weapon.
RED: No, the power supply to the super-weapon.
All we gotta do is get down there and cut it.
Okay, assuming we don’t get electrocuted, there are guards there, there and there.
And we don’t have enough rope to…
Watch and learn.
What? What are you doing?
[GASPS] He’s not clipped in.
Red, are you crazy?
Trust me. I know what I’m do…
[GRUNTS]
[GRUNTS]
So yeah. Rope wasn’t long enough.
I know that. It wasn’t supposed to be.
That’s part of my plan.
Except I wanted to be over on that side.
Okay, but…
Watch this!
[GRUNTING]
Nope. No, no, no.
Oh. Hello.
Hi. Now my plan really starts.
[LAUGHS AND SIGHS]
Hi again.
I swung back to tell you something, but I forgot what it was. Bye.
[GRUNTS] Got it. Got it. Okay, there we go.
There we go. Grip, grip, grip. Okay…
Huh? You hear something?
So you want a push?
Yes.
Ha, ha.
Hi. Oh, no. Your feather!
The guards!
Watch out.
Silver, what are you doing?
[♪♪♪]
[SIGHS] Oh, no.
Where’s Red?
Hey, Silver. Check it out.
This is how a hero saves the world.
Ha, ha.
Oh, come on! Nothing works around here!
Now we escape.
[ALARM BLARING]
[GUN COCKS]
You two are coming with me.
I… uh.
Nice abs.
I know.
[BEEPING]
LEONARD: Okay, try zero-zero-zero-zero.
[BEEPING]
Try one-two-three-four.
Now try four-three-two-one.
Try 1-800-OPEN.
I don’t know. Chuck, what’s your birthday?
Nothing’s working!
[GUARDS CHATTERING INDISCTINCTLY]
[GASPS] Oh, no. Someone’s coming.
Quick. Hide.
COURTNEY: Ouch.
[♪♪♪]
GADGET: There’s an eagle nearby.
There’s an eagle nearby. There’s an eagle near… All right. You get started on the lockdown sequence.
I’m gonna hit the john.
Yes, sir.
We gotta get that key card.
[URINE TRICKLING]
[CLEARS THROAT]
[CLEARS THROAT]
[WHISPERS] Okay, Courtney, get that card.
There’s something in the way.
[GROANS]
Chuck, what’s going on down there?
CHUCK: There’s a divider in the way.
[CLEARS THROAT]
Maybe it’s on the other side.
LEONARD: Okay, hold on.
[GRUNTS]
Pretend to pee-pee.
[SIGHS]
[GROANS]
Oh, no. He’s leaving.
Chuck, get that card.
I got it.
Aah!
[GASPS]
[GRUNTS]
[WAILING]
Yeah, I’m just gonna…
Boop.
[GROANS]
[YAWNS AND GASPS]
We’re home!
We’re home, everybody.
[ALL SMOOCHING]
[BOTH LAUGHING]
Yay!
Woo!
Oh, we missed you so much, Bird Island.
PIG: “Bird Island”?
This is Piggy Island, sillies.
Bird Island is way over there.
[SHIP HORN BLARING]
[INAUDIBLE DIALOGUE]
Ha, ha. We’re in!
Oh, my goodness gravy.
I wanna see.
LEONARD: No. Hold on!
CHUCK: I just wanna see.
LEONARD: We don’t have time.
[GUARD CLEARS THROAT]
Uh-oh.
[♪♪♪]
[♪♪♪]
BOMB: What? What’s happening?
I think he’s challenging us to a break-dance battle?
[PANTS] Aah!
Oh, it’s on!
Woo! Whoa!
CHUCK: What’s happening?
Looks like a popping and locking.
A little what?
[GASPS]
Pop, pop, pop!
ALL: Ah!
Hey, handsome.
Hey.
Take those two and put them on ice.
[GASPS]
They got Red and my sister. We gotta go.
But the super-weapon.
That’s my sister, mister.
And I’m gonna save her.
LEONARD: Chuck, slow down.
Slow down. Stop!
[GRUNTS]
[EAGLES WHOOPING]
Oh, yeah!
[GROANING]
Hmm?
Huh?
Hey.
[GRUNTS]
Hey. You done?
What happened?
Oh, let’s see.
Well, you got us captured and trapped in ice on top of giant pool toys.
Good job.
I just thought that maybe if I could…
Stop me?
Yeah, you two lovebirds just thought y’all could sail over here and stop me.
Lovebirds? No way.
No, no, no.
We’re barely, like, friend birds.
So typical.
Type-A male paired with a strong female, and you just can’t stand it, can you?
Well, I…
Let me guess.
You prefer to fly solo.
[MOCKINGLY] I have to save everybody all by myself!
[NORMALLY] Just like a man.
Ooh, ouch. That is kind of true, though.
Maybe she was a little clingy at times.
Maybe she gave you that engagement ring a little bit too early.
I don’t think she’s talking about us.
Maybe she’s talking about…
[MUFFLEDLY] Mighty Eagle.
Debbie! Turn on the TV.
Yes.
Okay…
It’s the one with the red button on top.
DEBBIE: Okay…
Red, Debbie.
What I’m planning to do is take these little-bitty, undeveloped islands, and turn them into my own personal paradise.
[GASPS]
You’re insane!
I am putting myself first.
Because you know what? I worked hard for it, and I deserve it.
All I gotta do is clear out all these inhabitants.
[BEEPS]
You’re a monster!
[ZETA LAUGHS]
Glenn, show them what I’m talking about.
[SPEAKS IN SPANISH]
ZETA: Excuse me? Are you getting smart with me right now?
[LAUGHS]
ALL: ♪ I can’t believe we’re soaring Through the sky! Sky! ♪
♪ All thanks to our pig pals They are cool ♪
ALL: ♪ Guys! Guys! ♪
[ALL YELLING]
What the heck was that?
[ALL GASP] Piggy Island?
PIG: Attention, everyone!
It is imperative that you all run for your lives!
[ALL SCREAMING]
[ALL GASP]
ALL: Bird Island?
My mommy and daddy.
Huh?
[GASPING]
Terence? Where are the kids?
[GROWLS]
Where are the kids?
[ALL SCREAMING]
I don’t understand.
I thought Red was supposed to save us!
[ALL GASP AND YELL]
Oh, my gah…
Huh? Oh, my gah.
Oh! Ha-ha-ha!
It actually worked.
Yes, yes, yes!
Those islands are filled with innocent birds and pigs!
You all had the chance to evacuate.
But for some reason, you didn’t.
[GASPS]
So you are 100 percent sure we shouldn’t evacuate?
I am sure. No one needs to evacuate.
Everybody just stay calm.
Sorry. Ha-ha-ha.
Not sorry. I’m truly not sorry.
[LAUGHS]
[LAUGHS]
[GRUNTS AND YELLS]
[THUDS]
[SIGHS] Dodged that bullet.
[♪♪♪]
[CHUCKLES]
[GULPS]
[BOTH GRUNTING]
[PANTS AND SIGHS]
This is all my fault.
Red, it’s not your fault.
No. It… It is my fault.
I put myself before everyone else.
I was afraid if I wasn’t a hero anymore, they’d all stop…
They’d all stop liking me.
Oh, Red. So you did all of this because you were afraid of not being liked?
I…
Yes.
ZETA: My fellow eagles, who’s tired of living in an icy wasteland?
ALL: We are!
What is she doing?
ZETA: Who is tired of sipping hot chocolate and getting brain freeze?
Aah! Me!
ZETA: Who’s tired of frozen dinners?
Whoa, frozen dinners?
Come on, Bomb, let’s go.
Who’s tired of playing only only Vanilla Ice, Ice-T and Ice Cube?
I am.
Who wants to live worry-free under a beautiful tropical sun?
[CHEERING]
Me! I want to be hot!
[GROANS]
I want it hot!
There’s no turning back!
The future we deserve is about to be ours!
Glenn! Activate the weapon!
Start the countdown.
COMPUTER: Ten minutes to launch.
[♪♪♪]
[LAUGHS]
BOMB: All right, stand back.
Wait, did you hear that too?
Bomb?
[ALL COUGHING]
What in the…?
Really, guys?
What? No. We weren’t…
Uh. Yeah, they were.
Guys, why is that clock counting backwards?
We’ve only got 10 minutes.
It’s now or never.
Pig-kind and bird-kind are depending on us.
What are we gonna do, Red?
Well, I, uh..
I think… in times like these, we need someone who can lead.
We need a hero.
You know what we need? We need Silver.
ALL: Huh?
[GASPS]
Oh.
Got any ideas?
I’ve got a few, actually.
Okay.
That’s the heart of the super-weapon, and if you look closely, you can see that it’s powered by air pressure.
Moisture around a composite volcano instantly vaporizes, sending a plume of highly pressurized steam to the surface.
That steam is contained by the pressure chamber.
And that’s the part we need to destroy.
Only problem is, it’s surrounded by armed guards.
Bomb. Do you think you can take out those guards?
Some of them look kind of tough.
It won’t be easy.
[GUN COCKS]
Yeah, right. Of course. Got it.
Great. Chuck, I need you to disable the security cameras.
There’s a bunch, so you’ll have to work fast.
Fast? Don’t even worry about it, sis.
Red, you and I have to get inside one of those ice balls.
Inside an ice ball?
I… Sure. Okay.
Leonard, Courtney, Garry, do you see that giant lever near the orange lava tube?
Copy that.
SILVER: I need you to pull it.
That will create a ramp so when Red and I roll down in the ice ball, we’ll be launched through the air at the perfect trajectory to take out the super-weapon.
Got it?
LEONARD: Now you’re talking.
Great plan, Silver.
Mama would be so proud.
Okay, everyone put your wings and hooves in.
ALL: Go, team!
[♪♪♪]
Chuck, let us know when you’ve disabled the cameras.
Okay. On it.
[GUN COCKS]
Easy, boys.
Heh-heh-heh.
[EXCLAIMS HAPPILY]
[CHUCKLES]
Heh.
Huh? Hey, Jerry.
Yeah?
Come here. Look at this.
What’s up?
[CHUCK WHISTLES]
Uh… It says everything’s normal.
[LAUGHS]
Jerry, are you seeing this?
[TOILET FLUSHES]
Uh… I don’t see anything.
No, not that one.
Not over here.
Oh, I think this one’s it.
♪ Hello ♪
♪ Is it me You’re looking for? ♪
♪ I can see it in your eyes ♪
♪ You’re all I’ve ever wanted ♪
LEONARD: We just need to get over to that track and follow it up to the lever.
BOTH: Okay.
Phew.
Ow!
Don’t touch the lava tube.
I don’t know if I’m gonna fit.
Just suck in your butt.
[YELLING]
[SIZZLING]
Does anyone smell bacon?
[GRUNTS] Ow!
Aah!
No one can see me. Light on my toes.
♪ I’m sneaking I’m sneaking up real quiet ♪
[GRUNTS]
♪ Who took you out? I don’t know ♪
♪ Because I didn’t hear Them coming ♪
♪ Because they snuck up On me ♪
Captain, you seeing this?
No one sees me.
Take them out.
So why didn’t you just team up with Chuck?
He’s definitely faster than me.
Nope, he’s too light.
Why not Bomb, then? You know, he’s heavier than me.
Too slow. You’re perfect.
Oh, that’s funny. I thought we weren’t compatible.
Yeah. Well, um, you know…
Some of the variables changed, so…
Oh, variables, huh?
So, uh, what are we doing here?
[GRUNTS] We’re on a mission.
Oh, yeah, the mission. Of course.
Okay, Bomb, we are in position.
Time to take out those guards.
Copy that.
Come on, Bomb, hold it together.
Tighten up. You can do this.
[GRUNTS]
We got a 10-91G in the control room.
Roger that.
[PANTS] Oh!
You can do this, Bomb.
Just take them out. Just take them out!
[LAUGHING]
Thanks for taking us out, man.
Even Glenn’s having a good time!
♪ Baby shark, doo, doo Doo, doo, doo, doo ♪
♪ Baby shark, doo, doo Doo, doo, doo, doo ♪
♪ Baby shark Doo, doo, doo, doo ♪
♪ Baby shark ♪
GLENN: All together!
Silver, baby sharks have taken the bait.
Roger that. Okay, Leonard. Time for Plan X.
Plan X? I thought you said spandex.
BOTH: Spandex?
♪ I’m too sexy for my shirt ♪
♪ Too sexy for my shirt ♪
Well, I’m working with what I got.
Looking good, guys.
Looking good.
[BOTH WAILING]
You gotta swing your arms.
I am swinging my arms.
I’m swinging them like this.
[LAUGHS AWKWARDLY AND SIGHS]
[EXCLAIMS HAPPILY]
Yes!
[SING-SONGY] Three minutes to launch.
Debbie, we are starting over, girl.
This is like New Year’s.
Oh, my gosh, yes, okay.
I’m gonna get some glitter and decorations.
This is gonna be so much fun!
[YELLING]
[HONKS]
DEBBIE: Zeta!
We have a problem.
Oh, my good… Aah!
Go find them!
[♪♪♪]
Okay. That’s where the ice balls are made.
We’ve gotta jump in that hole at the exact moment that the jaws open up.
Are you sure about this?
Uh. Actually, no.
Going with my gut this time.
Whoa. Didn’t expect that.
DEBBIE [OVER PA]: Attention, all eagles. The prisoners have escaped.
♪ Doo, doo Daddy shark ♪
All right, guys, back to work!
GUARD: Go! Let’s do this!
Guys, guys, guys! Whoa, hold on!
We’re not done hanging out and having a good time.
Silver, we’ve got a problem.
ALL: ♪ Back to work Doo, doo, doo ♪
♪ Doo, doo, doo Back to work ♪
Jump on the count of three.
Got it.
One, two… three!
Whoa!
Whoa!
Ha, ha. It worked! Red?
Ha, ha. We did it!
[GRUNTS]
[BOTH GASP AND YELL]
Oh, no. What the…?
Lava injectors!
I got this one.
Oh, whoa, Red!
SILVER: Aah! Aah!
Well, it’s all downhill from here.
BOTH: Whoa!
Okay, now what?
If my calculations are correct, we should be tall enough to reach that lever if all three of us…
Garry?
[GASPS]
Uh… Hang in there!
[BOTH YELLING]
Whoa!
Okay, new plan.
We need to get to 65 miles per hour.
Left, right, left, right.
At least we’re gonna get all our steps in.
COMPUTER: Two minutes to launch.
ZETA: Two minutes, everybody!
Two minutes to launch!
BOTH: Left, right, left, right.
We gotta break that super-weapon!
SILVER: Leonard.
Yeah?
Is the ramp elevated?
We’re working on it.
[GRUNTS]
What are we gonna do?
Uh…
Okay, let’s just figure this out.
I have an idea.
Yeah. Now is not the time, Courtney.
I’m just trying to figure out how we’re gonna get up to that lever.
Hey. Leonard.
Huh?
Oh, that could work!
Silver! How we doing on speed?
We’re maxing out at 59 miles per hour.
We need to get to 65!
It’s stuck! We need more weight!
Okay. Here goes.
It… It’s moving!
Oh, that’s not good.
BOTH: Aah!
[GRUNTS]
[BOTH PANTING]
Sixty-three, 64…
One more minute!
Yes!
COMPUTER: One minute.
Let’s just clear these houses from your beachfront view.
LEONARD: The lever is broken!
Broken?
Leonard, don’t you have any gadgets you can use?
We’re almost to the ramp.
Gadgets?
Gadgets!
[SING-SONGY] Forty-five seconds.
Attention, all personnel.
Initiating launch sequence.
COMPUTER: Initiating.
Garry, any way you can bring me the gadgets?
No, there isn’t.
LEONARD [ON COMM]: Chuck, I need Garry’s backpack.
On it.
Garry, where are you?
GARRY: Chuck, over here!
Hi-yah!
Yes! We’ve reached 65 miles per hour!
Fifteen seconds.
Ha, ha! Let’s do this!
COMPUTER: Fourteen, 13, 12… 11… ZETA: Ten. Nine.
Leonard, it’s now or never.
Oh, no.
SILVER: Got to raise that ramp!
ZETA: Seven. Six.
Five.
Four. Three.
Two.
And one!
GADGET [DISTORTED]: There’s an eagle nearby.
There’s an eagle nearby.
Yeah!
There’s an eagle nearby.
[GASPS]
No!
Huh?
Huh?
That’s my sister!
[COUGHS NORMALLY]
[GASPS]
[LAUGHS]
It didn’t work?
I… I don’t get it.
[LAUGHS] Of course it didn’t work.
[LAUGHING]
You must really love your little islands to risk your lives trying to save them!
Well, guess what?
I don’t care.
Because this right here is ice-cold, baby.
[ALL GASP]
No!
MIGHTY EAGLE: Zeta!
What?
Wait!
What? What…?
Mighty Eagle!
Yeah!
[♪♪♪]
[GASPS]
I’m the cause of all this.
I ran out on you on our wedding day.
And ever since then, you’ve been tormented inside.
Now? This is when you choose to do this?
So take me!
Not these islands.
You have got some flipping nerve!
I know!
I ripped your heartstrings right out.
That’s it. Super String.
What?
…has been burning a hole in your sanity!
Set yourself free…
SILVER: Okay, I’m seeing it.
Yeah.
Go ahead. Do your worst to me.
Chuck.
I deserve it.
[SCOFFS]
[GRUNTS]
You think this is about you, Ethan?
Ethan?
Oh, that is so hilarious / embarrassing / I hadn’t thought about your fat butt in 20 years.
Wait, what?
You are a lazy, uncoordinated, fish-eyed fool.
You ain’t worth the salt in your bread.
You are nothing to me! You are nothing!
I don’t think about you at all.
I don’t think about your stinking feet.
I don’t think about your rusty hands.
I don’t think about your rusty elbows…
Wait, so you have or you haven’t thought about me?
News flash, bro: I am over you, I’m over this place, and I am ready to get that upgrade situation going for me and my daughter.
Hey.
[ALL GASP]
Well, our daughter.
[GASPS]
What?
[ALL GASPING]
[SPEAKS IN SPANISH]
[BARKS]
That’s my dad?
I have a daughter?
Yes, you do!
And I raised her all by myself in this icy wasteland.
But now I’m gonna be sipping piña coladas on those warm tropical islands like I deserve to!
[GRUNTING]
Stop!
Oh, no.
[♪♪♪]
Huh?
It’s working!
Yes!
Oh, no.
[GROANS]
Gotcha!
[ALL STRAINING]
You can do it!
Hold on to that string!
The hatchlings.
Oh, no! They’re in trouble!
Jump!
[ALL SCREAM]
[GASPS]
Everyone…
ALL: Run!
Let’s go!
No, no, wait.
This is not happening.
Gotcha!
[YELLING AND GRUNTING]
EAGLE 1: I’m freaking out!
EAGLE 2: Me too!
[♪♪♪]
[BARKS]
[BARKS]
[BOTH WHINE]
[GROANS]
[COUGHS]
[GROANS]
[GRUNTS]
[BOTH GROAN]
We did it.
We did it.
Debbie?
Where is she? Where’s Debbie?
Debbie?
[CRYING]
Debbie, no.
What have I done?
Oh, Debbie.
[GASPS]
[GRUNTING]
[GASPS]
Are you okay?
Sweetie?
Honey pie?
Love of the last one minute of my life?
[GROANS]
Dad?
Yes.
You are so strong!
He saved my life!
Oh, Debbie.
Mom, can we keep him?
Please?
Oh, I, uh…
Wait. Wait.
Before you answer, you should see something.
Wait, wait, wait.
Mm-hmm.
And the one closest to my heart.
♪ I don’t want to wait ♪
♪ For our lives to be over ♪
♪ Will it be yes Or will it be ♪
♪ Sorry? ♪
Oh, no.
♪ Doo, doo, doo Doo, doo ♪
♪ Doo, doo, doo Doo, doo ♪
You are so pitiful.
♪ Yeah ♪
CHILD: I’ve never been to a wedding before!
BIRD: Oh, okay, who’s getting married again?
Oh, Terence, this is like our wedding but expensive. Ha, ha.
Flowers for you, flowers for you.
RED: Ladies and gentlemen, birds and pigs, we are gathered here today because of these two characters.
Not only because they’re being joined in holy matrimony, but also because one of them tried to destroy our islands for her own selfish reasons.
[LAUGHS]
Guess who.
Oh, it’s such a beautiful wedding.
It really is.
But Mighty Eagle swooped in at the last second and got all the credit for stopping her.
Yes, you did, baby.
I love you.
Wrap it up.
I now pronounce you eagle and husband.
You may now kiss the…
Come here, you.
Ugh!
All right. Get it, Mighty Eagle.
Oh, that is disgusting!
Go, Zeta! Go, Dad!
Attention!
Attention, everybody. Eyes on me. Hi.
Hi. Look up here.
I would like to propose a toast to the bird who made all of this possible.
[CHUCKLES]
Our hero, Red.
Give it up for Red!
BIRD: Yeah!
CROWD [CHANTING]: Red! Red! Red!
KIDS: You’re our hero, Red!
Red! Red! Red!
Oh. Easy, guys.
Hollow bones. I’ve got hollow bones.
Who loves you, Red?
Yeah, Red!
Oh, wow. I mean, thanks, guys. I… Thank you.
CHUCK: Speech, speech, speech!
[♪♪♪]
Looks like they still love you, Red.
Um, okay, well, you know, I’m…
I’m honored, everybody. Really, I… And I just, um…
Give me two seconds. I’ll be right back.
Woo! Good speech! Yeah!
Excuse me. Excuse me. Pardon me.
Excuse me. I’m just trying to squeeze through here.
Hey, hey, hey! Silver!
Huh?
Wow. I, um… Thank you, guys.
Thank you for this. And for all the support and love.
You know, it means… Well, it means everything to me.
But, um, I don’t deserve it.
She does.
What just happened?
Is that the nerd from our physics class?
This is the real hero right here.
Silver is the one who came up with the plan to stop the super-weapon and ultimately saved all our lives.
Red, I didn’t do this all on my own.
Right. Because we’re a team.
We couldn’t have done anything without Chuck and Bomb, or Courtney and Garry.
Thank you.
RED: Or Leonard. Actually, we probably could’ve done it without Leonard.
Let’s be honest, huh?
Leonard’s the man!
I did everything! I got the sub!
And even Mighty Eagle.
So handsome.
BIRD: Ethan!
And last, but certainly not least, those adorable hatchlings.
[ALL GIGGLE]
We are strongest when we all band together.
Just like Super String.
Let’s hear it for Silver!
BIRD: Yes!
[GASPS] I want to be an engineer.
BIRD 1: All right! Yeah, Silver!
BIRD 2: We love you, Silver!
Okay, Garry, now.
On it.
CHILD 1: Oh, my gosh!
CHILD 2: We’re famous!
BOMB: Look at that.
Oh, look! It’s me!
You see, these guys are the real heroes.
They’re the ones who deserve your love, not me.
We love you even more now, Red!
CHILD: Yeah, Red! We love you!
See? You’re not in this alone.
I’m married now. Let’s party, y’all! I’s married!
[♪♪♪]
[SINGERS VOCALIZING]
ZETA: Debbie, get away from the punch bowl, girl!
Come over here and dance with your mama!
Mm-mm!
BIRD: Hey, y’all!
CHILD: Mom, watch this!
Oh, yeah! Hey, where’s Red and Silver?
♪ The only one for me Is you ♪
Okay, worms or birdseed?
Huh?
Kidding. I know it’s toast.
Ha, ha. Toast.
You know, I was actually being sarcastic when I said that was my favorite, just for the record.
What? You?
Sarcastic?
No way.
I see what you’re doing.
Okay.
Maybe you can teach me sometime.
Maybe I will, when you’re not too busy saving the world.
You know, I actually just finished doing that, so I’m pretty free.
Oh, no way. Because I’m pretty free too.
Well, I don’t have anything to do either!
Wait a minute. What’s that sound?
Tickle Train? Coming to Third Wheel Station!
RED & SILVER: Chuck, no!
BOTH: Jinx, jinx, jinx!
[SINGER VOCALIZING]
[CHILDREN LAUGHING]
Laugh it up, everybody.
Ha-ha-ha.
No one can stop me.
I’ll stop you, Zeta.
Ha-ha-ha.
Well, you can’t stop me from… showing you how cute my little sisters are when they’re sleeping.
BOTH: Yay!
[ALL LAUGH]
[♪♪♪]
Aw, they’re so cute.
I kind of thought they’d be hatched by now.
They’re hatching!
Yay!
Here they come!
Oh, my gosh! I see one!
[ALL GASP]
ALL: Mama!
Uh-oh.
[DOORBELL RINGS]
[KNOCK ON DOOR]
[♪♪♪]
[ALL GULP]
Can I help you?
[CLEARS THROAT]
Oh. Sorry.
Mama?
Hi.
[GASPS]
My baby sisters!
Yay!
Bye.
[GASPS]
Mama!
[GIGGLING]
Oh, baby sisters.
We love you so much.
We should take good care of them and never let them out of our sights.
Yeah. We’ll never let them out of our sights.
Huh?
Bye-bye.
♪ This is gonna be The best day of your life ♪
♪ Of your life Of your life ♪
♪ This is gonna be The best day of your life ♪
♪ Of your life Of your life ♪
♪ This is gonna be The best day of your life ♪
♪ Of your life Of your life ♪
♪ This is gonna be The best day of your life ♪
♪ Of your life Of your life ♪
♪ Hey, you ♪
♪ This is gonna be The Best day of your life ♪
♪ Of your life Of your life ♪
♪ This is gonna be The best day of your life ♪
♪ Of your life Of your life ♪
♪ This is gonna be The best day of your life ♪
♪ Of your life Of your life ♪
♪ This is gonna be the best day Of your life, of your life ♪
♪ Uh, I took a walk This mornin’ ♪
♪ The sun was shinin’ for me ♪
♪ It got me feelin’ like oh Oh, oh, oh-ooh ♪
♪ The sky is lookin’ so blue So I do what I want to ♪
♪ I’m feelin’ myself like oh Oh, oh, oh-ooh ♪
♪ I’m feelin’ so nice ♪
♪ I ain’t got no Negative energy ♪
♪ High fives and good vibes ♪
♪ Wrote this one for all My friends and enemies ♪
♪ Hey, you ♪
♪ This is gonna be The best day of your life ♪
♪ Of your life Of your life ♪
♪ This is gonna be The best day of your life ♪
♪ Of your life Of your life ♪
♪ This is gonna be The best day of your life ♪
♪ Of your life Of your life ♪
♪ This is gonna be The best day of your life ♪
♪ Of your life Of your life ♪
♪ Go live it up ♪
♪ Hey ♪
♪ Oh, I tell them It’s my birthday ♪
♪ Who doesn’t want That free cake? ♪
♪ Let’s celebrate like oh Oh, oh, oh-ooh ♪
♪ I’m dancing in my foyer ‘Cause I’m my own employer ♪
♪ Why don’t you all come over Yeah? ♪
♪ I’m feelin’ so nice ♪
♪ I ain’t got no Negative energy ♪
♪ High fives and good vibes ♪
♪ Wrote this one for All my friends and enemies ♪
♪ Hey, you ♪
♪ This is gonna be The best day of your life ♪
♪ Of your life Of your life ♪
♪ This is gonna be The best day of your life ♪
♪ Of your life Of your life ♪
♪ This is gonna be The best day of your life ♪
♪ Of your life Of your life ♪
♪ This is gonna be The best day of your life ♪
♪ Of your life Of your life ♪
♪ Go live it up ♪
♪ La-la-la La-la-la-la ♪
[WOMAN VOCALIZING]
♪ La-la-la La-la-la-la ♪
♪ This is gonna be The best day of your life ♪
♪ Of your life Of your life ♪
♪ This is gonna be The best day of your life ♪
♪ Of your life Of your life ♪
♪ This is gonna be The best day of your life ♪
♪ Of your life Of your life ♪
♪ This is gonna be The best day of your life ♪
♪ Of your life Of your life ♪
♪ This is gonna be The best day of your life ♪
♪ Of your life Of your life ♪
♪ This is gonna be The best day of your life ♪
♪ Of your life Of your life ♪
♪ This is gonna be The best day of your life ♪
♪ Of your life Of your life ♪
♪ This is gonna be The best day of your life ♪
♪ Of your life Of your life ♪
[♪♪♪]
♪ You’re from one side Of the tracks ♪
♪ And I live on the other ♪
♪ Why we don’t see eye-to-eye ♪
♪ Really ain’t no wonder ♪
♪ But you got the rock And I got the roll ♪
♪ You got the heart And I got the soul ♪
♪ So let’s just be friends ♪
♪ Ain’t gotta fight about it Let’s find our way around it ♪
♪ Let’s just be friends ♪
♪ Hey, what do you say? ♪
♪ If we don’t even know What we were fussin’ about ♪
♪ Don’t you think it’s time We work it out? ♪
♪ Let’s just be friends ♪
♪ Hey, let’s just be friends ♪
♪ Yeah, we’re pretty good alone But I bet that together ♪
♪ We could make some noise this Town would talk about forever ♪
♪ We’ve been back and forth And pickin’ sides ♪
♪ When you ain’t wrong And I ain’t right ♪
♪ So let’s just be friends ♪
♪ Ain’t gotta fight about it Let’s find our way around it ♪
♪ Let’s just be friends ♪
♪ Hey, what do you say? ♪
♪ If we don’t even know What we were fussin’ about ♪
♪ Don’t you think it’s time We work it out ♪
♪ Let’s just be friends ♪
♪ Hey, let’s just be friends ♪
♪ You’re big city And I’m small town ♪
♪ The best of both worlds is What it sounds like ♪
♪ Let’s just be friends ♪
♪ Aw, let’s just be friends ♪
♪ Let’s just be friends ♪
♪ Ain’t gotta fight about it Let’s find our way around it ♪
♪ Let’s just be friends ♪
♪ Hey, what do you say? ♪
♪ If we don’t even know what We were fussin’ about ♪
♪ Don’t you think it’s time We work it out ♪
♪ Let’s just be friends ♪
♪ Hey, let’s just be friends ♪
♪ Aw, let’s just be friends ♪
[♪♪♪]

The Republic of Clanankia

Tf is that?

The Republic of HOLY COW AN ANARCHY

Clanankia wrote:Tf is that?

The Angry Birds 2 movie script

The Empire of Sharknov

I thought it was the bee movie

The Republic of HOLY COW AN ANARCHY

Sharknov wrote:I thought it was the bee movie

The Bee Movie is a little higher

The Republic of HOLY COW AN ANARCHY

For being an RMB where you can pretty much say anything, it sure is quiet most of the time

The Free Land of Low income housing enviroment

Yeah but like, this regions more for casuals who just go on here when theres nothing to do.

The Chinese Soviet

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