The Republic of Old Emporia is a gargantuan, genial nation, ruled by Elizabeth with an even hand, and remarkable for its sprawling nuclear power plants, multi-spousal wedding ceremonies, and absence of drug laws. The compassionate, democratic population of 13.451 billion Old Emporians enjoy extensive civil rights and enjoy a level of social equality free from the usual accompanying government corruption.

The medium-sized, liberal government prioritizes Education, although Healthcare, Industry, and Environment are also considered important, while Spirituality and Defense aren't funded at all. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of New Rapture. The average income tax rate is 66.7%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The frighteningly efficient Old Emporian economy, worth a remarkable 1,445 trillion dollars a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. The industrial sector, which is quite specialized, is led by the Information Technology industry, with major contributions from Tourism, Book Publishing, and Retail. Average income is an impressive 107,468 dollars, and distributed extremely evenly, with practically no difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Where there's a will there is usually a password manager, the immigration office has an express line for people bringing cash in briefcases, it is illegal for police officers to carry out searches due to strict privacy laws, and collisions between bicycles and carnival floats are on the rise. Crime is totally unknown. Old Emporia's national animal is the Crow, which soars majestically through the nation's famously clear skies.

Old Emporia is ranked 20,935^th in the world and 676^th in The North Pacific for Highest Foreign Aid Spending, scoring 1,145.33 on the Clooney Contribution Index.