The Kingdom of Olarista is a colossal, safe nation, ruled by Joaquim with a fair hand, and renowned for its smutty television, otherworldly petting zoo, and punitive income tax rates. The hard-nosed, hard-working, democratic, devout population of 8.276 billion Olarienses live in a state of perpetual fear, as a complete breakdown of social order has led to the rise of order through biker gangs.

The relatively small, pro-business government prioritizes Industry, although Defense, Administration, and Education are also considered important, while Welfare and International Aid receive no funds. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Olaria City. Citizens pay a flat income tax of 69.5%.

The frighteningly efficient Olaristan economy, worth a remarkable 2,469 trillion Dollars a year, is broadly diversified and led by the Retail industry, with major contributions from Information Technology, Arms Manufacturing, and Book Publishing. Average income is an amazing 298,363 Dollars, with the richest citizens earning 9.9 times as much as the poorest.

White strait-jackets are the new orange jumpsuits, the government only invests in infrastructure after a natural disaster, defense lawyers often argue there's no proof murder victims weren't vampires, and the nation's industries are scrambling to switch to biodegradable plastics. Crime is totally unknown, thanks to a capable police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Olarista's national animal is the Eagle, which teeters on the brink of extinction due to toxic air pollution, and its national religion is Christianity.

Olarista is ranked 1,902^nd in the world and 4^th in Portugal for Safest, scoring 149.25 on the Bubble-Rapp Safety Rating.