The Federal Republic of Phthalo is a huge, efficient nation, renowned for its avowedly heterosexual populace, frequent executions, and pith helmet sales. The hard-nosed, devout population of 721 million Phthalians are prohibited from doing almost everything except voting, which they do timidly and conservatively.

The medium-sized, moralistic government juggles the competing demands of Law & Order, Defense, and Administration. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Cotz. The average income tax rate is 50.6%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The all-consuming Phthalian economy, worth 66.2 trillion Leibsmarks a year, is broadly diversified and led by the Information Technology industry, with major contributions from Arms Manufacturing, Book Publishing, and Trout Farming. State-owned companies are common. Average income is 91,879 Leibsmarks, and distributed extremely evenly, with little difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

T-bagging dead Bigtopians merits a medal of honor, preschools put children down for naps with milk, cookies, and a gruesome story of vengeance, criminals rejoice in the streets as the entire police force is sent away on a training retreat, and no-one bats an eye when 'really good platonic friends' of the same sex hold hands in Phthalo. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Phthalo's national animal is the White-Shouldered Eagle.

Phthalo is ranked 37,913^th in the world and 15^th in Der Leibwache for Most Extensive Public Healthcare, scoring 3,607.48 on the Theresa-Nightingale Rating.