The United Islands of Iontan is a gargantuan, socially progressive nation, ruled by the Executive Leader with a fair hand, and notable for its smutty television, restrictive gun laws, and devotion to social welfare. The compassionate, democratic, cheerful population of 33.656 billion Iontanians are free to do what they want with their own bodies, and vote for whomever they like in elections; if they go into business, however, they are regulated to within an inch of their lives.

The enormous, liberal, socially-minded government juggles the competing demands of Education, Environment, and Healthcare. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Iontan City. The income tax rate is 100%.

The frighteningly efficient Iontian economy, worth a remarkable 8,024 trillion Tayoes a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. The industrial sector, which is extremely specialized, is mostly made up of the Book Publishing industry, with significant contributions from Information Technology. Average income is an amazing 238,413 Tayoes, and distributed extremely evenly, with practically no difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

The saying "when pigs fly" has been changed to "when the lights work", all tribal children are set for life with guaranteed government jobs, populations of two-headed Panthers have been found around recently-uncovered archaeological sites, and a little love goes a long way claim Iontian news. Crime is totally unknown, thanks to a capable police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Iontan's national animal is the Panther, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests.

Iontan is ranked 263,333^rd in the world and 340^th in 10000 Islands for Highest Drug Use, scoring 44.41 on the Pineapple Fondness Rating.