The Glorious Empire of Burning Pants is a gargantuan, efficient nation, ruled by The King of Braves with a fair hand, and notable for its flagrant waste-dumping, keen interest in outer space, and suspicion of poets. The hard-nosed, hard-working, democratic, humorless population of 21.598 billion Burner of Pants live in a state of perpetual fear, as a complete breakdown of social order has led to the rise of order through biker gangs.

There is no government in the normal sense of the word; however, a small group of community-minded, corrupt, liberal, pro-business, outspoken individuals juggles the competing demands of Education, Healthcare, and Industry. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of adventure. Income tax is unheard of.

The frighteningly efficient Pants-Burner economy, worth a remarkable 7,906 trillion G-Stones a year, is driven almost entirely by the private sector, which is broadly diversified and led by the Information Technology industry, with major contributions from Arms Manufacturing, Retail, and Uranium Mining. Average income is an amazing 366,053 G-Stones, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 3.2 times as much as the poorest.

East Lebatuckese luxury goods are plundered by the working class of Burning Pants, teddy bear James Dean (aka "the Rebel Without the Claws") helps convince kids that candy cigarettes are cool, the police have been reduced to using duct tape instead of handcuffs following further cutbacks, and nihilistic thrill-seekers claim that suicide by roller coaster is the ultimate life experience. Crime, especially youth-related, is so common that it is unusual to encounter someone following the law, perhaps because of the country's complete lack of prisons. Burning Pants's national animal is the Fighting Mechanoid, which is also the nation's favorite main course, and its national religion is The Oath Sworn Through Courage.

Burning Pants is ranked 529^th in the world and 22^nd in Lazarus for Largest Gambling Industry, scoring 25,700.64 on the Kelly Criterion Productivity Index.