The Crowned Republic of Schlifland is a massive, safe nation, ruled by Paul McKinley with a fair hand, and renowned for its barren, inhospitable landscape, compulsory military service, and sprawling nuclear power plants. The hard-working, democratic population of 2.475 billion Schlifans enjoy a sensible mix of personal and economic freedoms, while the political process is open and the people's right to vote held sacrosanct.

The relatively small, outspoken government juggles the competing demands of Defense, Education, and Law & Order. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Bogenstadt. Citizens pay a flat income tax of 22.8%.

The frighteningly efficient Schlifan economy, worth 310 trillion doldars a year, is broadly diversified and led by the Information Technology industry, with significant contributions from Book Publishing, Retail, and Arms Manufacturing. Average income is an impressive 125,474 doldars, but there is a significant disparity between incomes, with the richest 10% of citizens earning 457,035 per year while the poor average 24,484, a ratio of 18.7 to 1.

The "temporary replacement bus service" is now a permanent fixture, Pinkerton agents are called in to forcibly break up white collar strikes, octogenarian swimsuit models insist that they've still got it, and small children are learning a lot of new words from a teacher with Tourette Syndrome. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a capable police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Schlifland's national animal is the Adder, which can occasionally be seen sifting through garbage in the nation's cities, and its national religion is CoS Protestantism.

Schlifland is ranked 146,749^th in the world and 5,518^th in Lazarus for Largest Gambling Industry, scoring 550.62 on the Kelly Criterion Productivity Index.