Most Politically Apathetic Citizens: 170thLargest Agricultural Sector: 377thHighest Economic Output: 395th
The Pub of
Inoffensive Centrist Democracy
So it goes.
Influence
Auxiliary
Beelzebub
Region
Civil Rights
Very Good
Economy
Frightening
Political Freedom
Some

Overview Policies People Government Economy Rank Trend Cards

Cynical Alcoholics

Population35.837 billion

CapitalScotchistan
FaithAlcoholism

Currencycorpse
Animalpink elephant

The Pub of Cynical Alcoholics is a gargantuan, socially progressive nation, remarkable for its unlimited-speed roads, frequent executions, and smutty television. The hard-nosed, hard-working, humorless population of 35.837 billion Alcoholics have some civil rights, but not too many, enjoy the freedom to spend their money however they like, to a point, and take part in free and open elections, although not too often.

The tiny, corrupt government is primarily concerned with Education, although Law & Order and Industry are also considered important, while Social Policy and Welfare receive no funds. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Scotchistan. Income tax is unheard of.

The frighteningly efficient Cynical Alcoholicsian economy, worth an astonishing 10,947 trillion corpses a year, is broadly diversified and led by the Information Technology industry, with major contributions from Tourism, Gambling, and Uranium Mining. Black market activity is frequent. Average income is an amazing 305,473 corpses, and distributed extremely evenly, with little difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Elementary school students are required to master Bach's Chaconne in D before graduation, the government sends submarines to retrieve bodies from shipwrecked submarines, anti-vaxxers claim that injected children are prone to psychotic breaks when they see the 'Queen of Diamonds' playing card, and the optimally efficient parking strategy for business commuters is referred to as the "traveling salesman problem". Crime, especially youth-related, is a serious problem, with the police force struggling against a lack of funding and a high mortality rate. Cynical Alcoholics's national animal is the pink elephant, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests, and its national religion is Alcoholism.

Cynical Alcoholics is ranked 9,099th in the world and 10th in Hell for Highest Wealthy Incomes, with 417,632 Standard Monetary Units.

Top
1%
Most Politically Apathetic Citizens: 170thLargest Agricultural Sector: 377thHighest Economic Output: 395thLargest Gambling Industry: 453rdLowest Overall Tax Burden: 582ndHighest Disposable Incomes: 612thLargest Basket Weaving Sector: 761stLargest Cheese Export Sector: 873rdLargest Populations: 1,029thLargest Soda Pop Sector: 1,148thLargest Automobile Manufacturing Sector: 1,299thLargest Mining Sector: 1,327thHighest Poor Incomes: 1,335thSmartest Citizens: 1,568thMost Efficient Economies: 1,631stHighest Workforce Participation Rate: 1,698thRudest Citizens: 1,711thMost Secular: 1,773rdLargest Pizza Delivery Sector: 1,777thHighest Average Incomes: 1,987thTop
5%
Largest Furniture Restoration Industry: 2,513thLargest Insurance Industry: 2,750thLargest Publishing Industry: 3,252ndLargest Retail Industry: 3,254thMost Scientifically Advanced: 3,809thLargest Black Market: 3,858thMost Developed: 4,241stMost Influential: 4,419thLargest Manufacturing Sector: 5,488thMost Advanced Public Education: 6,412thMost Beautiful Environments: 7,521stHighest Crime Rates: 8,195thFattest Citizens: 8,619thMost Corrupt Governments: 8,847thHighest Wealthy Incomes: 9,099thLargest Information Technology Sector: 9,666thMost Cultured: 9,671stMost Armed: 11,080thMost World Assembly Endorsements: 11,810thTop
10%
Most Rebellious Youth: 12,265thLargest Trout Fishing Sector: 16,208thLargest Governments: 16,891stMost Valuable International Artwork: 18,654thHighest Drug Use: 19,169thLargest Arms Manufacturing Sector: 19,635thMost Advanced Law Enforcement: 24,219th
Top
5%
Most Secular: 2nd in the regionLargest Soda Pop Sector: 2nd in the regionMost Politically Apathetic Citizens: 2nd in the regionLargest Gambling Industry: 2nd in the regionSmartest Citizens: 2nd in the regionTop
10%
Lowest Overall Tax Burden: 3rd in the regionHighest Poor Incomes: 3rd in the regionLargest Retail Industry: 4th in the regionMost Efficient Economies: 4th in the regionHighest Workforce Participation Rate: 4th in the regionMost Developed: 4th in the regionLargest Agricultural Sector: 4th in the regionLargest Basket Weaving Sector: 4th in the regionMost Influential: 5th in the regionLargest Pizza Delivery Sector: 5th in the regionHighest Disposable Incomes: 5th in the regionHighest Crime Rates: 5th in the regionLargest Cheese Export Sector: 5th in the region

National Happenings

Most Recent Government Activity:

  • : Cynical Alcoholics was ranked in the Top 5% of the world for Highest Crime Rates.
  • : Following new legislation in Cynical Alcoholics, the optimally efficient parking strategy for business commuters is referred to as the "traveling salesman problem".
  • : Following new legislation in Cynical Alcoholics, anti-vaxxers claim that injected children are prone to psychotic breaks when they see the 'Queen of Diamonds' playing card.
  • : Following new legislation in Cynical Alcoholics, the government sends submarines to retrieve bodies from shipwrecked submarines.
  • : Following new legislation in Cynical Alcoholics, elementary school students are required to master Bach's Chaconne in D before graduation.
  • : Cynical Alcoholics was ranked in the Top 5% of the world for Highest Crime Rates.
  • : Following new legislation in Cynical Alcoholics, pawn shop reality shows dominate basic cable.
  • : Following new legislation in Cynical Alcoholics, kissing cousins produce the heartiest babies.
  • : Cynical Alcoholics was ranked in the Top 1% of the world for Largest Furniture Restoration Industry.
  • : Cynical Alcoholics was ranked in the Top 5% of the world for Most Rebellious Youth.

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World Assembly

Endorsements Received: 3 » The Stalker, Kyraina, and Freddland.

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