The Republic of Calametia is a titanic, socially progressive nation, ruled by Amy Doe with an even hand, and renowned for its museums and concert halls, vat-grown people, and restrictive gun laws. The compassionate, democratic population of 15.844 billion Calametians enjoy extensive civil rights and enjoy a level of social equality free from the usual accompanying government corruption.

The large, socially-minded government juggles the competing demands of Education, Welfare, and Healthcare. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Oblivion. The average income tax rate is 66.6%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The Calametian economy, worth 783 trillion smeckins a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. The industrial sector is led by the Basket Weaving industry, with major contributions from Information Technology, Trout Farming, and Book Publishing. Average income is 49,436 smeckins, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 2.7 times as much as the poorest.

Airplane passengers have been known to stuff pillows in their jackets to get extra arm room, the minority inevitably have their addenda vetoed, listless juries are assembled for the simplest of court cases, and religious turf wars have caused frustrated police to pray for divine intervention. Crime is totally unknown, thanks to a capable police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Calametia's national animal is the opossum, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests.

Calametia is ranked 277,805^th in the world and 131^st in Forest for Highest Unexpected Death Rate, scoring 25.43 on the Bus Surprisal Index.