The United Republic of Borstein is a massive, socially progressive nation, ruled by Johnathan Mauser with an even hand, and remarkable for its compulsory military service, pith helmet sales, and stringent health and safety legislation. The compassionate, hard-working, democratic population of 1.756 billion Borstenians have some civil rights, but not too many, enjoy the freedom to spend their money however they like, to a point, and take part in free and open elections, although not too often.

The medium-sized government juggles the competing demands of Administration, Education, and Law & Order. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Franklinburg. The average income tax rate is 47.4%, but much higher for the wealthy.

The all-consuming Borsteinian economy, worth 168 trillion Borstenian Euros a year, is fairly diversified and led by the Book Publishing industry, with major contributions from Tourism, Information Technology, and Arms Manufacturing. Average income is 96,011 Borstenian Euros, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 2.5 times as much as the poorest.

Families waiting for delayed pipe installations hope daily for rain, the roar of the Niagara 3000 mega-loo can be heard several blocks away, the nationalised Arms Manufacturing Industry is not interested in making weapons, and flu research is commonly shut down for fear of creating a superbug. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Borstein's national animal is the Panther, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests.

Borstein is ranked 219,912^th in the world and 1,046^th in Europe for Largest Cheese Export Sector, scoring -4 on the Mozzarella Productivity Index.