The Greater Empire of The Islands of Tonga is a gargantuan, efficient nation, ruled by King David Tupou XVII with an even hand, and notable for its disturbing lack of elderly people, aversion to nipples, and stringent health and safety legislation. The compassionate, hard-working population of 12.046 billion Tongan's have some civil rights, but not too many, enjoy the freedom to spend their money however they like, to a point, and take part in free and open elections, although not too often.

The medium-sized, corrupt government juggles the competing demands of Education, Industry, and Defense. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Kava Lund. The average income tax rate is 82.0%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The frighteningly efficient Tongan economy, worth a remarkable 1,948 trillion Pa'angas a year, is fairly diversified and led by the Information Technology industry, with major contributions from Book Publishing, Arms Manufacturing, and Woodchip Exports. Black market activity is frequent. State-owned companies are common. Average income is an impressive 161,737 Pa'angas, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 2.4 times as much as the poorest.

Creating dance remixes is the newest form of conspicuous consumption, government negotiators never forget to say "pretty please" when begging for custody of its criminals, Tongan TV is considered cruel and unusual punishment in other countries, and literature classes frequently go on field trips to rock concerts. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. The Islands of Tonga's national animal is the Pacific Golden Plover, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests, and its national religion is Lord Börk.

The Islands of Tonga is ranked 15,823^rd in the world and 12^th in Saint Helene for Most Subsidized Industry, scoring 8,027.88 on the Gilded Widget Scale.