The Bar on the corner of every regionBoard

Eripolis wrote:

A giant saucer descends upon the bar and hovers above the parking lot.... as the dust settles, it's revealed to be a a Miranda-class starship. The words "USS Absolyut" are written on it.
Is there a drink I can get? I'm also looking for a battery.

We have many drinks you can get. And you're in luck--since Feoras learned how to rewire hir sex-toys for wall current, we have a surplus of batteries lately. Do you need C or D size?

The Witness wakes up from their nap again and looks around at the suddenly packed Bar.

Ahh, visitors. And opportunities. Many, many opportunities. I'll have to set up a few things, get them right where I want them. Then profit as it passes. A nice and exotic feast.

The Witness peels themselves off their stool and kicks open a trapdoor, jumping down as it closes behind them.

Brocklandia wrote:

Down that hall, second door on your left, just past the stomach pumps.

*walks into bathroom* *walks out* Sir, why are the walls made of flesh and eyes in there.

Duncan the delivery doggo wrote:

Woof woof! (Translation) At least its not maple syrup!

Don't hate on maple syrup, eh!
Speaking of which, could you please bring me a jupiter-sized container of maple syrup, eh? I'll tip you with a lifetime supply of doggy treats and Canadian whiskey!

New natormy travelers wrote:

A small child pops their head out of a tent before reading that visitors need to buy a drink.

"Do you have apple juice? Can I have some?"[/i]

Don't drink the apple juice it's a trap, eh.

YouTube Inc wrote:

Hi hello welcome to the same bar that has YT in it;
expected nudity, drinking, potery, occasional existential crisis, the anti german-German Peoples Party of Germany against germans and to die of food poisoning before being resurrected by a dog and sent away.

Sounds aboot right, eh.
Not sure why me, a (probably, possibly, maybe not, at least partially, definitely) Cnadaidn person, would choose to settle down in this place, eh...

Eripolis wrote:

I mean... points at parked starship

What? Don't tell me you came all this way just to run out of gas ... or subnuclear plasma, or whatever that jalopy runs on? I haven't fallen for that "oh, no, we're out of gas" trick since I was 17.

Brocklandia wrote:

Oh, squeal! We're being visited by Steven Van Zandt, circa 1985! Hey, Little Steven, I'm a huge fan--Do you think you can get me Bruce Springsteen's autograph?

Wait what?

Hmmm

Third Place

Zombie Penguins wrote:

An ode to 3rd place

I asked before Brock
In a haiku, not an ode
But give me third place

In Second

Maple Hockey Canadia wrote:

A poem from up north, entitled "Give Me Second Place Because it's Better than Third, Eh"
Wind blows across the barren snowy wasteland
Waiting, watching, wishing for something
This is the land of Canada
Alive with the whispers of misty winter mornings
Alone in the icy, frozen north
Beautiful, bold, brave
Canada
Eh

And The Winner

Jehovahs witness wrote:

Isn't it a shame
When your plans go wrong
When your goodly mission's thwarted
By a ghastly siren's song

It's rather easy to predict
When their first wall will fall
They get that look in their eye
That tells me they fell thrall

Spread a message or two
Intended to ensnare their soul
Lace them with liquid happiness
And make it their life's goal

They speak of good health and temper
But they want to feel good instead
So they drink from my cups
Till their conviction's dead

A dash of alcohol
Some sugar and spice
Some choice processed ingredients
Now they'll only ever feel nice

Maple Hockey Canadia wrote:

Don't hate on maple syrup, eh!
Speaking of which, could you please bring me a jupiter-sized container of maple syrup, eh? I'll tip you with a lifetime supply of doggy treats and Canadian whiskey!

Don't drink the apple juice it's a trap, eh.

Sounds aboot right, eh.
Not sure why me, a (probably, possibly, maybe not, at least partially, definitely) Cnadaidn person, would choose to settle down in this place, eh...

WOOOOF woofo wooof ooooff fooowowo wooof woofof wooof (Translation) HMMMMMMMMMMMMM life time supply of doggy treats. OR. A lot of slurping for a while...... *Gives Maple Hockey Canadia his syrup* FOR THE DOGGY TREATS.

Brocklandia wrote:

Why are you telling Arcticfoxxo to be me? Doesn't ze have enough problems already?

ze?

Arcticfoxxo wrote:

ze?

Ja

oh so were just german now
*pulls out industry hat*
WELP (but in german)

was anfängst?

ich nehme an, Sie meinen Industrialisierung in diesem Fall ist die Antwort nicht