The Republic of Vintage Timber is a massive, socially progressive nation, notable for its barren, inhospitable landscape and spontaneously combusting cars. The hard-nosed, hard-working, democratic population of 2.171 billion Vintage Timberians live in a state of perpetual fear, as a complete breakdown of social order has led to the rise of order through biker gangs.

The minute, pro-business, outspoken government, or what there is of one, juggles the competing demands of Education, Healthcare, and Defense. Citizens pay a flat income tax of 6.1%.

The strong Vintage Timberian economy, worth 87.7 trillion gold coins a year, is driven almost entirely by the private sector, which is led by the Book Publishing industry, with major contributions from Furniture Restoration, Pizza Delivery, and Retail. Average income is 40,414 gold coins, but there is an enormous disparity between incomes, with the richest 10% of citizens earning 240,973 per year while the poor average 3,096, a ratio of 77.8 to 1.

The streets are increasingly clogged with poverty-stricken beggars, a large-scale revitalization of the education system is underway, the average video game can be completed over lunch break, and citizens volunteer for tax audits to avoid the 80-page Practical Assessment Survey Tool On Religions. Crime is a serious problem, probably because of the absence of a police force. Vintage Timber's national animal is the black cat, which can occasionally be seen sifting through garbage in the nation's cities.

Vintage Timber is ranked 25,747^th in the world and 8^th in Prison for Largest Publishing Industry, scoring 6,926.76 on the Bella Potter Productivity e-Index.