The British Commonwealth Realm of Toe-Cheeseland is a gargantuan, safe nation, ruled by Arthur Caratacus Livingstone with an even hand, and remarkable for its national health service, punitive income tax rates, and devotion to social welfare. The compassionate, hard-working, cheerful population of 33.114 billion Britons have some civil rights, but not too many, enjoy the freedom to spend their money however they like, to a point, and take part in free and open elections, although not too often.

The medium-sized government prioritizes Education, although Welfare, Healthcare, and Environment are also considered important, while Spirituality and International Aid aren't funded at all. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Manchester. The average income tax rate is 97.2%.

The frighteningly efficient British economy, worth a remarkable 8,975 trillion Pounds a year, is quite specialized and led by the Information Technology industry, with major contributions from Tourism and Book Publishing. State-owned companies are common. Average income is an amazing 271,048 Pounds, and distributed extremely evenly, with little difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Students select colleges based on wi-fi quality, no one questions why the chicken crossed the road anymore, elderly tribespeople die in bed surrounded by loved ones and linguists, and fraternities are rejoicing at government-subsidized partying. Crime is totally unknown, thanks to a capable police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Toe-Cheeseland's national animal is the British Bulldog, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests, and its national religion is British Christianity.

Toe-Cheeseland is ranked 4,860^th in the world and 1^st in The British Empire for Most Eco-Friendly Governments, scoring 8,417.54 on the Dolphin Recycling Awareness Index.