The Kingdom of Old World Order is a colossal, cultured nation, ruled by King Darius Banovic I with an iron fist, and notable for its closed borders, infamous sell-swords, and anti-smoking policies. The hard-nosed, cynical, devout population of 7.804 billion Croats of old world are kept under strict control by the oppressive government, which measures its success by the nation's GDP and refers to individual citizens as "human resources."

The large, corrupt, moralistic, well-organized government juggles the competing demands of Education, Law & Order, and Administration. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Delminium. The average income tax rate is 94.0%.

The frighteningly efficient Croatian economy, worth a remarkable 1,138 trillion Kunas a year, is quite specialized and led by the Tourism industry, with significant contributions from Retail, Book Publishing, and Arms Manufacturing. State-owned companies are common. Average income is an impressive 145,924 Kunas, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 3.2 times as much as the poorest.

New mothers can pay for their weekly grocery shop with a bottle of breast milk, large sections of Old World Order have been named national reserves to protect the native tribes living there, light entertainment isn't dead, and secret police deal with secret crimes. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a very well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Old World Order's national animal is the Dinaric Tiger, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests, and its national religion is Roman Catholicism.

Old World Order is ranked 48,947^th in the world and 654^th in Europe for Highest Food Quality, scoring 33.93 on the Meeshlin-Starr Index.