The Kingdom of Old World Order is a massive, efficient nation, ruled by King Darius Banovic I with an iron fist, and renowned for its parental licensing program, national health service, and complete lack of prisons. The hard-nosed, hard-working, cynical, devout population of 4.882 billion Croats of old world are kept under strict control by the oppressive government, which measures its success by the nation's GDP and refers to individual citizens as "human resources."

The large, corrupt, moralistic, well-organized government juggles the competing demands of Education, Administration, and Law & Order. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Zagreb. Citizens pay a flat income tax of 92.1%.

The frighteningly efficient Croatian economy, worth 688 trillion Kunas a year, is led by the Tourism industry, with major contributions from Retail, Basket Weaving, and Book Publishing. State-owned companies are reasonably common. Average income is an impressive 141,009 Kunas, but there is a significant disparity between incomes, with the richest 10% of citizens earning 413,147 per year while the poor average 37,961, a ratio of 10.9 to 1.

Exploding toys that leak battery acid are back in the shops after the government declared child safety 'over-rated', Croats of old world are regularly fired for looking at MyFace during their lunch breaks, anyone who doesn't attend Official Governmental Religious Services is fined, and airplanes have giant grilles on their noses to knock drones out of their path. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a very well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Old World Order's national animal is the Croatian Tiger, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests, and its national religion is Roman Catholicism.

Old World Order is ranked 43,894^th in the world and 537^th in Europe for Most Scientifically Advanced, scoring 134.32 on the Kurzweil Singularity Index.