The Dominion of Squeete is a mammoth, efficient nation, ruled by Prime Minister Richard Spenard with an even hand, and remarkable for its museums and concert halls, complete lack of prisons, and devotion to social welfare. The compassionate population of 7.296 billion Squeeteans are fiercely patriotic and enjoy great social equality; they tend to view other, more capitalist countries as somewhat immoral and corrupt.

The enormous, socially-minded government juggles the competing demands of Administration, Education, and Healthcare. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Squeete Bay. The average income tax rate is 93.1%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The frighteningly efficient Squeetean economy, worth 968 trillion dollars a year, is quite specialized and led by the Tourism industry, with major contributions from Information Technology, Trout Farming, and Book Publishing. State-owned companies are common. Average income is an impressive 132,792 dollars, and distributed extremely evenly, with practically no difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Occam's razor has sliced to pieces any childhood belief in Santa Claus and the Tooth Fairy, teachers are skilled at leaving no evidence of child cruelty, citizens can be frequently spotted going about their business stark naked, and many whiskies taste suspiciously like automobile radiators. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Squeete's national animal is the Massasauga rattler, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests, and its national religion is None.

Squeete is ranked 304,594^th in the world and 155^th in Canada for Largest Gambling Industry, scoring -21 on the Kelly Criterion Productivity Index.