The United Provinces of Priimydia is a gargantuan, socially progressive nation, ruled by Harlius Combestus with an even hand, and notable for its deadly medical pandemics, otherworldly petting zoo, and suspicion of poets. The hard-nosed, hard-working, humorless population of 10.958 billion Priimydians are either ruled by a sleek, efficient government or a conglomerate of multinational corporations; it's difficult to tell which.

The relatively small, corrupt government juggles the competing demands of Defense, Industry, and Education. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Priimydia. Citizens pay a flat income tax of 22.2%.

The frighteningly efficient Priimydian economy, worth a remarkable 2,095 trillion Priimydian Emeraldis a year, is broadly diversified and led by the Information Technology industry, with major contributions from Arms Manufacturing, Retail, and Book Publishing. Black market activity is rampant. State-owned companies are reasonably common. Average income is an impressive 191,230 Priimydian Emeraldis, but there is a significant disparity between incomes, with the richest 10% of citizens earning 577,142 per year while the poor average 49,366, a ratio of 11.7 to 1.

The annual Adult Film Awards have a category for most titillating aftershave advert, a soldier's body is a temple, handling people's data is proving an immersive experience, and eerie glow-in-the-dark cornfields give farmlands an uncanny appearance. Crime is pervasive, probably because of the absence of a police force. Priimydia's national animal is the Haast's Eagle, which is also the nation's favorite main course, and its national religion is Catholicism.

Priimydia is ranked 83,745^th in the world and 1^st in Tryzalore for Highest Unexpected Death Rate, scoring 34.16 on the Bus Surprisal Index.