The Eternal Assurance of Phaphonies is a mammoth, environmentally stunning nation, ruled by Epifanio de los Santos with an even hand, and remarkable for its sprawling nuclear power plants, rampant corporate plagiarism, and state-planned economy. The compassionate population of 5.695 billion Sagen enjoy extensive civil rights and enjoy a level of social equality free from the usual accompanying government corruption.

The large, liberal government juggles the competing demands of Education, Administration, and Defense. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Cajarc. The average income tax rate is 80.5%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The frighteningly efficient Sagan economy, worth 686 trillion Tabs a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. The industrial sector, which is fairly diversified, is led by the Tourism industry, with significant contributions from Information Technology, Book Publishing, and Arms Manufacturing. Average income is an impressive 120,472 Tabs, and distributed extremely evenly, with practically no difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Human tissue is grown in vats as a delicacy as well as for transplants, the nation's infamous boot camp is more brutal than most battlefields, water fights now end with thousands dead, and lawyers spend as much time preparing their make-up as they do their briefs. Crime is totally unknown, thanks to a capable police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Phaphonies's national animal is the Jaguarundi, which is also the nation's favorite main course, and its national religion is Absurdism.

Phaphonies is ranked 154,019^th in the world and 24^th in The Embassy for Most Extreme, scoring 18.2 on the Paul-Nader Subjective Decentrality Index.