The Empire of Lugmeltistan is a gargantuan, efficient nation, ruled by Lugard Melton with an even hand, and renowned for its zero percent divorce rate, irreverence towards religion, and stringent health and safety legislation. The compassionate population of 12.354 billion Lugmeltistanians are fiercely patriotic and enjoy great social equality; they tend to view other, more capitalist countries as somewhat immoral and corrupt.

The enormous government juggles the competing demands of Education, Environment, and Healthcare. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Lugmelt City. The average income tax rate is 98.2%.

The frighteningly efficient Lugmeltistanian economy, worth a remarkable 1,851 trillion Ardonics a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. The industrial sector, which is highly specialized, is mostly made up of the Information Technology industry, with significant contributions from Tourism and Book Publishing. Average income is an impressive 149,837 Ardonics, and distributed extremely evenly, with practically no difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

They who do not work shall not eat, extraordinary tribunals try accused financial criminals, drills and shovels have been banned as the government cracks down on any means of fracking, and nobody is allowed to stop the local daycare from reading Nietzsche to pre-schoolers. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Lugmeltistan's national animal is the Raven, which soars majestically through the nation's famously clear skies.

Lugmeltistan is ranked 4,694^th in the world and 274^th in Lazarus for Lowest Crime Rates, with 118.01 law-abiding acts per hour.