The Holy Imperial Realms of Last Velneria is a titanic, cultured nation, ruled by the Holy Emperor with an even hand, and renowned for its keen interest in outer space, pith helmet sales, and conspicuous electricity pylons. The compassionate, cheerful, devout population of 17.396 billion Velnerians enjoy extensive civil rights and enjoy a level of social equality free from the usual accompanying government corruption.

The large, corrupt government juggles the competing demands of Education, Administration, and Industry. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Ord Eldersum. The average income tax rate is 98.1%.

The frighteningly efficient Velnerian economy, worth a remarkable 4,029 trillion velnes a year, is fairly diversified and led by the Tourism industry, with significant contributions from Information Technology, Book Publishing, and Beef-Based Agriculture. State-owned companies are common. Average income is an amazing 231,611 velnes, and distributed extremely evenly, with little difference between the richest and poorest citizens.

Groups of government workers are declared protected tribes if they venture too deep into the Capitol, parents who try to organize playdates for their kids have police drop through their ceilings, commuters often break into synchronised para-para dancing for no reason at all, and the staffroom being an "icky" colour is a perfectly acceptable reason to not accept a job. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a capable police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Last Velneria's national animal is the Red Phoenix, which is also the nation's favorite main course, and its national religion is the Holy Primordial Church.

Last Velneria is ranked 3,227^th in the world and 1^st in Warzone Asia for Smartest Citizens, with 161.74 quips per hour.