The Port of Habutnick is a mammoth, genial nation, renowned for its daily referendums, compulsory military service, and multi-spousal wedding ceremonies. The compassionate population of 6.797 billion Habutnicks are fiercely patriotic and enjoy great social equality; they tend to view other, more capitalist countries as somewhat immoral and corrupt.

The enormous government juggles the competing demands of Education, Industry, and Environment. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Port Port. The average income tax rate is 84.8%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The frighteningly efficient Habutnickian economy, worth 734 trillion Habut Bits a year, is driven entirely by a combination of government and state-owned industry, with private enterprise illegal. The industrial sector, which is quite specialized, is led by the Information Technology industry, with major contributions from Tourism and Book Publishing. Average income is an impressive 108,046 Habut Bits, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 2.4 times as much as the poorest.

The government regularly reassures citizens that there are no monsters under their beds, swings are now more popular than see-saws in children's playgrounds, Port Port University is said to be the modern-day Tower of Babel, and fair-weather fans talk during plays while die-hard theatre enthusiasts stay at home. Crime is totally unknown, thanks to a capable police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Habutnick's national animal is the Flimflamflinggy, which is also the nation's favorite main course.

Habutnick is ranked 297,170^th in the world and 15,850^th in Lazarus for Largest Trout Fishing Sector, scoring -7.43 on the Nemo Depletion Efficiency Index.