The Armed Republic of Giathio is a mammoth, safe nation, ruled by Supreme Leader Varst with an iron fist, and remarkable for its avowedly heterosexual populace, otherworldly petting zoo, and ubiquitous missile silos. The hard-nosed, cynical population of 5.574 billion Giathians are kept under strict control by the oppressive government, which measures its success by the nation's GDP and refers to individual citizens as "human resources."

The medium-sized, corrupt government prioritizes Defense, with Law & Order, Industry, and Administration also on the agenda, while International Aid and Spirituality aren't funded at all. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Britannica. The average income tax rate is 76.3%.

The frighteningly efficient Giathian economy, worth 983 trillion Gnyoplas a year, is broadly diversified and led by the Arms Manufacturing industry, with significant contributions from Information Technology, Book Publishing, and Uranium Mining. Average income is an impressive 176,373 Gnyoplas, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 4.4 times as much as the poorest.

Newly-peaceful nations are forced to use assault rifles as farming tools due to a lack of funds for purchasing anything else, military pilots jettison listening devices as chaff to confuse enemy missiles, the military is blowing up any threat to employment within the nation, and the nation frequently scolds its subject territories for staying up past bedtime. Crime, especially youth-related, is totally unknown, thanks to a well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Giathio's national animal is the Raven, which is also the nation's favorite main course, and its national religion is CODECO Propaganda.

Giathio is ranked 322,360^th in the world and 250^th in The League for Largest Trout Fishing Sector, scoring -11.31 on the Nemo Depletion Efficiency Index.