The Commonwealth of Firebreathers is a very large, socially progressive nation, renowned for its pith helmet sales, punitive income tax rates, and devotion to social welfare. The compassionate population of 376 million Firebreatheans are fiercely patriotic and enjoy great social equality; they tend to view other, more capitalist countries as somewhat immoral and corrupt.

The large, socially-minded government juggles the competing demands of Education, Administration, and Industry. It meets to discuss matters of state in the capital city of Port Saint Boiling. The average income tax rate is 66.1%, and even higher for the wealthy.

The all-consuming Firebreathersian economy, worth 36.5 trillion suckers a year, is led by the Trout Farming industry, with major contributions from Tourism, Beef-Based Agriculture, and Retail. State-owned companies are common. Average income is 97,175 suckers, and evenly distributed, with the richest citizens earning only 2.2 times as much as the poorest.

A firework a day does not in fact keep the doctor away, trolls insist that strings of racial slurs mean "good morning" in obscure languages, water fights now end with thousands dead, and group hugs break out during floor votes. Crime is totally unknown, thanks to a well-funded police force and progressive social policies in education and welfare. Firebreathers's national animal is the Deepsea Volcano Snail, which frolics freely in the nation's many lush forests.

Firebreathers is ranked 11,037^th in the world and 29^th in The Western Isles for Nicest Citizens, with 29.77 average smiles per day.